Assalaamualaikum,
I am in talk to a person whom I am wishing to marry in future, but every time he talks about the closeness the married couple have. He is not bad in his character, but i wanted him to keep it in control till getting married. Sometime I get fear about intimacy because I actually don’t want that to happen, I mean the consummation of marriage. I fear when I hear about it. I wanted him to understand that I wanted his support but the fear in me isn’t going away whenever he talks. He leaves no stone unturned in getting diverted to the topic. I wanted a suggestion how to make him concentrated in future life and serious regarding it. He is well educated and earns too but he is always in romantic mood. Please suggest me how to make him get diverted from this and how to get rid of my fears regardiing the fear I feel whenever I think of getting married. I want a suggestion for both of us. Please kindly reply.
الجواب وباللہ التوفیق
You two are strangers for each other, and it is شرعاً (Shara’n) impermissible for a strange man and woman to talk to each other like this without any necessity. Furthermore, talking about the intimacy etc. like a married couple are more shameless. You should leave talking to him for the time being and make mashwarah (consultation) with your parents and responsible persons in this regard. Inshaa Allaah they will help you in choosing a proposal for you which will be of good manners and character and suitable for you per your situation.
واللہ اعلم بالصواب