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Husband spending on parents instead of family

Answered according to Hanafi Fiqh by Fatwa.org.au
asalamualaykum mufti i am in need of some of your help i suffer very bad depression and they have told me to take prescription medication but i have not got them yet i am using herbal is there any duas or any thing i can do to helpo me with my depression?

QUESTION 2 — my husbands parent live overseas and they keep asking us for money ys it is his haq to send her but i want to no this he has 2 other brothers who contantly send her money and we are strugling alot we buy our kids clothing secound hand we need to use our kids money to send her money because she fights with my husbnd untill she gets it we are very limited on money and can not fill our desires but when she fights with my husband he takes the kids money and sends her straight away what can i do? i buy every thing secound hand we have limited every thing i get told off if i spend money or if i do some thing is this right or wrong? inshallah please correct me? jazakullah khai for ur answers inshallah.

QUESTION 3—–
me and my hubsbND have had hard times and i find it hard to love him like i used to what are some ways i can build love and what are some duas i can use to help me stay patient also allah has been giving me dreams alot and the latest dream is about me my husband and another man this other man i used to love when i was younger and i had made istihara last year and asked allah if this man is not good for me to take him away allah has showed me a dream and in this dream i ran away from home to this man leaving my kids behind and i rang my husband to come get me and this man was a cow he was trying to get me out of the car and i told ,my husband to hurry and go and i pushed this guy out of the car and said to my husband im very sorry i love u so much what does this mean? does this mean allah is showing me who is right and wrong?

jazakullah khair for every thing asalamualaykum

Answer:

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

1) Please click on the following link for our previous answer on combating depression:

http://www.fatwa.org.au/depression.html

2) If according to the rules of Shariah the money belongs to your children, then your husband does not have the right to give this money to his parents. He may however give his own money to his parents if he wants, provided that he is not neglecting the rights of his family (wife and children).

It is a man’s responsibility to provide for his wife and children. If his parents are in need, it is his responsibility to provide for them too. However, it is not permissible to neglect the rights of one’s family by not providing for them and to instead give one’s money to someone else who is not in need, including one’s parents.

Hence, in your case, if your husband is providing for yourself and your/his children and thereby fulfilling your needs as well as the needs of your/his children, then it will be permissible for your husband to give his surplus money to his parents. If he is not fulfilling the needs of yourself and your/his children then it will not be permissible for him to give that money to his parents who are not in need of his financial support.

Therefore, if your husband is fulfilling the needs of yourself and your/his children and giving his surplus money to his parents because of which he is unable to spend more money on you and your children, you should be patient for the sake of Allah Ta’ala. Remember the huge rewards Allah has promised for the patient ones. Also, be grateful for what Allah Ta’ala has given you. Remember that there are so many people in the world who do not even have enough food to satisfy their hunger.

3) Having interaction and relationship with an unrelated man is absolutely forbidden in Islam. You must never interact with this man; nor should you ever think about him. The dream suggests that thinking about this man and interacting with him could devastate your life.

For suggestions on creating love between husband and wife, click on the following link:
 
http://www.fatwa.org.au/wazeefas-for-removing-friction-between-husband-and-wife-and-creating-love-between-them.html

And Allah knows best.

Mufti Faizal Riza
28/3/2012

This answer was collected from Fatwa.org.au, which is connected to Darul Ifta Australia, based in Melbourne, Australia.
It is operated by Mufti Faizal Riza, a student of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.

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