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Raising young daughter in the West

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Askimam.org

I belong to a fairly moderate income group. Recently my eldestdaughter attained the age of puberty. This development has placed me in agreat predicament. I was quite affected recently by a lecture I heard on thesins of intermingling of sexes. My daughter attends a public school whereshe is obviously involved in this. While it might appear to be easy to justremove her from school, I have to also consider her future. She definitelyrequires a career in order to make her financially self-sufficient in thesetimes of great economic strife. What should I do under these circumstances?


Almighty Allah Taála says in the Holy Qurãn ‘And (women) stay in
your homes and don’t display yourselves like the practice of the first
Jaahiliyya (pre-Islamic era)’. (Qurãn 33:33)

Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, ‘A woman is an object of
concealment. When she comes out; the Shaitaan accompanies her’. (Mishkãt)

The above quotations clearly indicate that the place of a woman is at home.
When she emerges out of the house, she becomes the tool of the Shaitaan to
spread mischief and corruption. In these modern times, there is a worldwide
campaign on recognition of women’s rights, according to the democratic
ideology which includes equality between men and women in earning, rank and
position. Such a position for women in society breathes corruption and
mischief. And the ghastly consequences such a position has already caused
are clear as day-light for all those of true intelligence.

The harms of giving your daughter ‘secular education’ under the existing
conditions is greater than the benefits. It is not permissible to risk the
honour of your daughter at the expense of securing her economic future.
Looking at the dangers and harms in schools, even the greatest worldly need
cannot justify the reason for sending your daughter to school.

The sustenance of every individual is the responsibility of Allãh: ‘There is
not a single creature on earth except that Allãh Taála has taken the
responsibility of its sustenance’. (Qurãn 11:6)

The Fuqahaa have explained that firstly the father has to support his
daughter until marriage. Upon marriage, the husband has to support her. If
the husband dies or divorces her, and she has elderly working sons, it is
their responsibility to support her. If she does not have sons, then the
father will have to support her again. If he is not in a position to support
her then, her brothers and relatives should support her. Islam has laid down
principles to support a woman in every turn of her life. If any of the above
does not materialize, she can even support herself by maintaining her honour
and dignity by doing something from indoors. She may do cooking, sewing,
baking, etc. and sell. There are many avenues of income. The secular form of
education is not the only way of earning an income. How many secular
graduates are penniless due to unemployment and how many secularly
uneducated women have regular income through private services?

Your concern should be to give your daughter good Islamic education, teach
her to be a loyal wife and responsible mother. Teach her the life of
simplicity and you may teach her some profession like sewing, etc. could
help her during a financial crisis.

And Allah Knows Best.

Mufti Ebrahim Desai

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This answer was collected from Askimam.org, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.

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