Sir,
Q 1- if a husband ask to his wife for sex, and if she refused oftenly.with reasons that she is not in mood, and after this, if husband indulge in some other immoral and sinful activities, then what would be position of both in front of ALLAH?.
Q-2 if a muslim, dont want to live , due to extra stress ,pain, and unhappines in his life, can he commit suicide ? is there any possibility that ALLAH forgive his sin, as he is aksing to ALLAH to resolve his problems but ALLAH didnt.
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatuh
1) When a husband and wife make nikaah Allah Ta’ala grants certain rights and privileges to one over the other. It is the duty of the man to provide shelter for the woman and to take care of her needs. Similarly, it is necessary for the woman to obey her husband at all times and to respect his authority over her.
Rasulullah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) has mentioned:
عن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم قال لو كنت آمرا أحدا أن يسجد لأحد لأمرت المرأة أن تسجد لزوجها
)سنن الترمذي ج1 ص219 سعيد)
“If I had to command anyone to make Sajdah (prostrate) to another person, I would of instructed the woman to make Sajdah to her husband”
Rasulullah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) also mentioned:
عن أبي هريرة رضي الله عنه قال قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم إذا دعا الرجل امرأته إلى فراشه فأبت فبات غضبان عليها لعنتها الملائكة حتى تصبح
(صحيح البخاري ج4 ص100 ,دار الفكر )
When a man calls his wife to bed and she refuses, he then spends the night upset and angry with her, the angels curse her till the morning.
If a woman has a valid reason for not responding positively to her husband, she should discuss this with him.
If there is no valid reason for not responding to him, she should rather obey him and save herself from the curses of the angels. However, if she does not offer herself to her husband, it does not give him the right to abuse his chastity and to involve himself in any illicit relations. If he commits any evil or immoral act, he will be responsible for his own actions and answerable for it on the day of Qiyaamah.
2) In actual fact, suicide does not put a stop to all problems and worries, rather it puts a start to much more distress and problems (in the Qabr and in the hereafter). As believers in the Kalimah, we believe in Taqdeer and that all good and bad is from Allah. Many a times Allah Ta’ala afflicts a person with certain problems and calamities, this is only a test from Allah and he wants to see how we respond to these adverse conditions. Whether we are patient and put our reliance on Allah, or do we turn our backs and have an evil perception regarding Allah. Accordingly Allah Ta’ala will reward the person, whether it is appearent in this world or the hereafter.
Rasulullah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) has mentioned:
ومن قتل نفسه بشيء في الدنيا عذب به يوم القيامة
(البخاري ج2 ص893 ديوبند)
“Whoever kills himself in this world using some kind of object, He will be punished with the same item on the day of Qiyaamah”
If a person makes dua and asks Allah to help and assist him, then he should not lose hope and continue asking Allah. If his duas are not answered immediately, then too, he will not leave empty handed. He will see the fruits of his sacrifice later.
And Allah knows best
Wassalaamu `alaykum
Ml. Rayhaan Docrat,
Student Darul Iftaa
Checked and Approved by:
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Darul Iftaa, Madrassah In’aamiyyah