Question
Maaf wanted to find out a masala regarding whether a wife is allowed to open her husband’s parcel without his permission
And also, is a wife allowed to check her husband’s phone
Answer
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Islam has given great importance to a person’s privacy. Shari’ah has also emphasized the importance of having good thoughts regarding our fellow Muslims and has prohibited harboring negative assumptions, doubts and suspicions.
Almighty Allah says,
يَاأَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اجْتَنِبُوا كَثِيرًا مِنَ الظَّنِّ إِنَّ بَعْضَ الظَّنِّ إِثْمٌ وَلَا تَجَسَّسُوا (الحجرات: 12)
Translation: “O you who believe, refrain from excessive (negative) assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. And do not spy on one another.”
Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) said,
قال أبو هريرة: يأثر عن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم، قال: إياكم والظن، فإن الظن أكذب الحديث، ولا تجسسوا، ولا تحسسوا، ولا تباغضوا، وكونوا إخوانا
Translation: “Refrain from doubts/assumptions for verily doubts/assumptions are the worst lies. And do not make undue inquires, and do not spy, and do not have mutual quarrels, but be (united) as brothers.” (Bukhari-5143)
In another hadith it is narrated:
عن أبي هريرة قال نصر عن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم قال: حسن الظن من حسن العبادة
Translation: “Abu Hurairah (Radhiyallahu Anhu) narrates that Rasulullah (Sallalahu Alaihi Wasallam) said, good thought (of others) is from good worship.” (Abu Dawood-4993)
In light of the above, spouses must have complete faith in each other. We do not even need to provide evidence for the number of marriages that are disrupted due to lack of trust, doubts and suspicions by a spouse. When an assumption is allowed to develop, it leads to many evils and serious conflict between people.
This also means that a spouse should not be a means of creating doubt in their better half. All misunderstandings must be clarified, and secrecy must be avoided at all costs. However, an individual is still entitled to his/her privacy to an extent. Unless clear proof is found of a spouse’s misconduct, their privacy must be respected.
If the husband does not wish for his messages, mail and packages to be opened by his wife, she should respect his wish. Similarly, if the wife wants her privacy, the husband must respect her desires. However, a healthy marriage is based entirely on mutual trust which is the antithesis to secrecy. Neither the husband nor the wife should have cause to resort to ‘privacy’ with their mail, messages and packages, especially if they claim to be loyal and true to their marriage.
It is understandable for a wife to feel threatened and attempt to go through her husband’s personal items if she perceives strange behavior from him. However, the best approach is to directly confront the husband and clarify the matter. It is unhealthy to let doubts and suspicions linger in one’s mind.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Bilal Yusuf Pandor
Checked and Approved by
Mufti Nabeel Valli
Darul Iftaa Mahmudiyyah
Lusaka, Zambia