Q. Can you explain to me the significance of preparing the grave the way Muslims do?
Also I recently went to an aunt’s funeral, and I decided to leave before the hearse left. Someone told me that I should not leave before the dead because it is bad! Why? Is this part of Islam?
I was also told that when leaving the home of the dead, do not look back. Does this have any bearing with Islam?
Also, should women go to the graveyard?
A. The manner in which Muslims prepare the grave is in accordance to the way it was prepared during the time of the Prophet (S.A.W.). The Prophet (S.A.W.) never raised a grave high, he would not build it firmly with baked bricks or stones or similar materials. He would not coat it or plaster it with any thing that would later become hard, nor would he mount any structure, dome or cupola over the grave.
It is greatly rewarding for males to accompany the body to the graveyard for burial after performing the Salaatul Janaazah. As such they are encouraged to remain in order to perform the Janaazah Salaah as well as to do the burial. Women are absolved from these, and there is no harm upon them if they leave before the deceased is carried away from the home.
No, there is no teaching in Islam which places any such restrictions of not looking back at the home of the deceased.
According to many scholars, it is not permissible for women to visit the graveyard. This is due to the fact that women may not be able to control their emotions and may go against the rules of the shariah. Some scholars have given the permission for them to visit the graveyard provided that they abide by the rules of the shariah.
And Allah knows best.
Mufti Waseem Khan
This answer was collected from DarulUloomTT.net, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Waseem Khan from Darul Uloom Trinidad and Tobago.