My friend lives in USA, his daughter is 21 years old unmarried and college student studying at a distance of 9 hours from parents home. Both parents are muslim and religious. The girl does not follow islam. She wants to live life of this world. She does not like religious talk from parents. She does not want to come visit her at college. Parents suspect that girl is living immoral life. They suspect she has relations with men and drinks alcohol. The girl wants parents to pay her living expense and college expense. The father does not want to pay her expenses. The father does not to speak with daughter but has to let come visit family because mother and other siblings want to see her. What is religious obligation of father.
1. Does father has to pay her expenses even if daughter does not listen to him or his advise on moral and religious issues. And if he has to pay what should be paid like food, tution, travel, car expenses and repairs etc?
2. Does father has to speak to her even if she says she is adult and does not to do anything that his father wants. Or can father stop her from coming home and cut off relationship with her?
3. And Can she be bared from her inheritence in father’s assest.
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
We take note of the unfortunate plight of your friend regarding his daughter.
There could be many questions asked about the cause of the daughters conduct, for example, why did the religious parents act unreligiously in sending the daughter away from home to study.
However, such questions may not help the situation. The religious parents should make tawbah and repent for the wrong decisions regarding their daughter.
It also may not be useful to answer the three questions you refer to about paying the daughter expenses, breaking contact with her and barring her from inheritance.
In general it is not permissible to deprive ones heir from inheritance. [i]
In principle, when one is engaged in sin, one should adopt the most effective measure in trying to reform the person. At times, supporting a sinful person may lead the person into further sin and at times, punishing the person may have adverse effects especially in the era of kufr and irtidaad we live in.
Your friend should consult with appropriate people who know her daughter and her temperament and adopt the most effective way in dealing with her.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Mirza Mahmood Baig
Student Darul Iftaa
Jeddah, KSA
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
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[i] سنن أبي داود (2/ 127)
2870 – حدثنا عبد الوهاب بن نجدة قال ثنا ابن عياش عن شرحبيل بن مسلم سمعت أبا أمامة قال
Y سمعت رسول الله صلى الله عليه و سلم يقول ” إن الله قد أعطى كل ذي حق حقه فلا وصية لوارث ”
(حسن صحيح)