I am a 26 yrs old widow of 7 mnths.i would like to know what r the islamic rules on me as a widow.i am a full time worker as well a mother of 3 young kidz.
Pls tell me how my lifestyle should be?i dont want to earn gunaah by living the way i am not suppose live.was i suppose to celebrate eid and the future eids as well if allah grants me
Pls help me .there r so many young widows r not knowing what to do after their husband leaves them.
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatoh
When a woman becomes a widow, she will have to spend iddat of four months and ten days if she has not conceived. If she has conceived, then her iddat will be until the birth of her child. The iddat period of a woman is meant to mourn the loss of her beloved. She will express grief by neither donning clothing of beauty nor adorning herself with jewellery. She is required to abstain from applying any perfume, dressing her hair with oil (scented or not), applying kohl (surma) or using henna. She may however be permitted to utilise any of the above due to medical reasons.
A widow may leave her house during the day and if need be, into part of the night in order to attain her necessary livelihood. This is due to the fact that expenses of the house have now fallen upon her. She may not be directly proposed to for marriage during her iddat period. The iddat period of a widow begins upon the passing of her husband.
When a man divorces his wife, she will have to spend iddat of three menstrual cycles, excluding the one in which she may have been when issued the divorce.
If due to either old age or being too young she does not menstruate, her iddat will be for the duration of three months.
If she has conceived at the time of the talaaq (divorce), her iddat will terminate upon the delivery of the child.
She is required to abstain from beautifying herself as outlined above. She may not, however leave the confines of her house during the iddat period. The iddat period commences immediately after the divorce was issued.
The iddat of a widow and divorcee will have to be carried out in the house which was considered as her place of residence at the time of the separation or death.
Sister in Islam, although you have now been compelled to provide for your family, you should at no time disregard the Islamic injunctions of hijaab upon you. You should maintain hijab to the best of your ability. Look after your chastity and maintain shame and modesty at all times. In these days of fitna and evil even widows and divorcees are vulnerable to the attacks and onslaughts of people with evil intentions. You should be alert and guard yourself against that.
Your children are your most precious possessions. Ensure that you strive to afford them with the best possible Islamic upbringing, thereby attaining the great rewards promised for you.
Sahl bin Sa’d (RA) narrates that the Prophet of Allah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, “The person who cares for any orphan (one whose father dies before reaching puberty) will be with me in Jannah like this,” and the Holy Prophet (SAW) indicated with his middle finger and index finger (indicating the extreme closeness in Jannah). (Bukhari)
Anas (RA) narrates that the Holy Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, “Whoever cares for two young girls until they reach maturity will be close to me on the day of Judgment like these to fingers.” He then joined his fingers. (Muslim)
The day of Eid is for joy and happiness. You should celebrate Eid in the future.
And Allah knows best
Wassalam
Shabeer Moosa,
Student 6th Year
Checked and Approved by:
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Darul Iftaa, Madrassah In’aamiyyah