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My Dyeing Friend: How do I advise him to leave his hair alone?

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Qibla.com

Answered by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Someone I know has recently dyed his hair red and blond. I don’t believe he is doing this to imitate kafirs, perhaps more to be ‘unique’. I want to give nasiha to him but really don’t know how to explain that this is really not the best thing for a Muslim male to do. How do you suggest I explain it from a fiqh point of view?

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Walaikum assalam

First, while disliked, this person’s actions are not strictly speaking unlawful. As such, correcting them returns to giving advice (nasiha) rather than forbidding the wrong.

There is rarely smoke without a fire. There are probably reasons for such behavior. These usually return to weakness (or weakening) of faith and religious drive. These matters are rarely solved by mere words.

Rather, one should have a forward-looking plan for people like this. One should befriend them, and lovingly direct them towards good company, and towards the good. Few people accept being dragged to Paradise. But if you show them the way with loving kindness, most are willing to go there themselves.

Our criterion in life, in every single action, should be: ‘What would the Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him & give him peace) have done in my situation?’

The Prophet (Allah bless him & give him peace) was a mercy to everyone and everything. He was soft, loving, and easy-going.

Become friends with this person, for the sake of Allah. Be patient with him. Show him sincere love. Do ‘neutral’ things with him. Don’t shove Islam down his throat. Actually, don’t even mention Islam to him at all! Hang out in halal ways with him. Hear him out. Show him, through your actions not just your words, that you care about him as a person.

Once you win a person’s heart, your words can enter it. Otherwise, don’t bother. This is part of wisdom.

Allah Most High tells us in the Qur’an that, “Whoever is given wisdom has been given great good.”

Imam Barkawi (Allah have mercy on him) defined wisdom (hikma) as being, “An ability in one’s self through which one discerns the right from wrong.” (al-Tariqa al-Muhammadiyya, 2.33)

The Oxford Dictionary of Philosophy defines wisdom as:

“Wisdom: A form of understanding that unites a reflective attitude and a practical concern. The aim of the attitude is to understand the fundamental nature of reality and its significance for living a good life.”

“The highest wisdom has but one science – the science of the whole – the science explaining the whole creation and man’s place in it.” Tolstoy, Leo (1828 – 1910) War and Peace, Bk. V, Ch. 2, 1865-69

Walaikum assalam,

Faraz Rabbani.

This answer was indexed from Qibla.com, which used to have a repository of Islamic Q&A answered by various scholars. The website is no longer in existence. It has now been transformed into a learning portal with paid Islamic course offering under the brand of Kiflayn.

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