Respected Mufti Desai, My sister is very frustrated with her husband who has been mentally, physically and emotionally abusive to her. She calls us and tells our family about all this. It truly upsets us and is causing problems in our family such as with my parents. What is the Islamic way of dealing with a situation like such? Jazakallah!
Assalaamu Alaykum Wa Rahmatullaahi Wa Barakaatuhu
You may apply wisdom and diplomacy and forward the following article to your
and Allah Ta’ala Knows Best
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
TO MR. MUSLIM HUSBAND
It is not only with pain, but also anguish, that we are once again, beseeching you, Mr. Muslim husband, to behave. Your repeated misdoings have been found adding to the already long list of Muslims? problems. When you divorce your Muslim wife on less-than-Islamic grounds in a less-than-Islamic manner, you unwittingly provide an effective handle for your baiters, who have always been on the prowl and are ever in search of opportunities to undo you.
It is because of your misconduct that today so many girls of marriageable age, not having sufficient dowry, are living a dusk-to-dawn life in their parents? homes.
It is again your misbehaviour that is adding to the already long list of divorcees of marriageable age, with your children, in many cases. And they are not finding suitable takers. There are widows of all ages. Ask about their agony either from them or their aging guardians.
Has it ever occurred to you that your outrageous acts tarnish the face of Islam? Have you ever thought that your indignant behaviour sends your enemies into peels of laughter? Do you know the “potentialities” of fiddling in a big way with Shariah that your scornful actions produce?
Muslim body politic is already full of wounds. Don?t add to them. Your contemptuous behaviour with your wife is one of the hurdles, that is preventing Muslims from showing their positive, constructive side.
How can we convince the sceptics and critics that Islam is not retrograde, regressive and oppressive?
Radiance Views Weekly (9-15 JULY 2000)