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Can I live with an impotent Husband?

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Askimam.org

assalamualikum

I married a man whom i thought to be religious.However after marriage i realised hes impotent.

However he still is punctual in prayers and has good character.

He even apologized me for being impotent.

He also mentioned me the reasons for his impotence which is excessive masturbation alogn with watching porn

.He suffers from low testosterone because of excessive masturbation

I forgave his past though as he quit the porn addiction and is basically very nice person in character.

Know if i choose to live with him as i love him …..is there any sin on me?

He has good qualities which i admire

1.he does all fundamentals of islam 2.good knowledge of surahs of quran and does other dawah works

he said unfortunately he fell into trap of porn which ruined him to this extent

whenever we are together we recite quran and hadees to each other …everything goes well.

I want to be with my husband and keep helping him with medicines but my parents have separated me and kept me at their home..

what shall i do we havent divorced yet but i love him a lot ….being away from him is paining me ..and when am with him i also become more religious in terms of prayers and other ibadaat

what shall i say to parents what if they insists on divorce ..but i love him

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Sister in Islam,

We take note of the contents of your email and the challenges you are being faced with.

May Allah Ta’ala elevate your status and reward you for assisting your husband.

May Allah Ta’ala grant your husband complete Shifaa. Aameen.

Physical intimacy is a right of both, husband and wife equally.  However, if the wife is willing to forego her right, then she may do so. [1]

If you wish to continue persuading the marriage with your husband, that is your choice. Your parents cannot force you to terminate the marriage. You may advise your husband to seek medical help.

You may inform your parents that your husband is seeking medical treatment and request them to be patient and make du’a for your husband.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Muhammad I.V Patel

Student Darul Iftaa
Lusaka, Zambia

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

_________


[1] النتف في الفتاوى للسغدي (1/ 302) 

وَالثَّانِي ان علمت بِهِ بعد مَا نكحته ثمَّ رضيت بِهِ فَلَا خِيَار لَهَا بعد ذَلِك

 

بدائع الصنائع في ترتيب الشرائع (2/ 325)

وَأَمَّا حُكْمُ الْخِيَارِ، فَهُوَ تَخْيِيرُ الْمَرْأَةِ بَيْنَ الْفُرْقَةِ، وَبَيْنَ النِّكَاحِ، فَإِنْ شَاءَتْ اخْتَارَتْ الْفُرْقَةَ، وَإِنْ شَاءَتْ اخْتَارَتْ الزَّوْجَ، فَإِنْ اخْتَارَتْ الْمُقَام مَعَ الزَّوْجِ؛ بَطَلَ حَقُّهَا

وَلَمْ يَكُنْ لَهَا خُصُومَةٌ فِي هَذَا النِّكَاحِ أَبَدًا لِمَا ذَكَرْنَا أَنَّهَا رَضِيَتْ بِالْعَيْبِ، فَسَقَطَ خِيَارُهَا،

 

المحيط البرهاني في الفقه النعماني (3/ 173)

وإن اختارت زوجها أو قامت من مجلسها أو أقامها أعوان القاضي أو قام القاضي قبل أن تختار شيئاً بطل خيارها

This answer was collected from Askimam.org, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.