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Someone Else’s Istikhara Contrary to One’s Own Istikhara

Answered as per Shafi'i Fiqh by Seekersguidance.org

Question: I am seeing a girl for marriage, she initially did istikhara and did not receive any signs so she went ahead with the proposal. We haven’t been engaged yet but our families have visited. I also prayed istikhara and went ahead with my gut feeling. I also saw in a dream that we were texting each other. Now she performed the istikhara again because her sister wanted to do an instant istikhara from someone. She saw a dream where we are married and in Saudia but not talking to each other because we are fighting. Can you please help me with the interpretation of this dream?

Answer:

Assalamu alaykum,

Thank you for your question. Istikhara is a prayer that one prays for seeking guidance, with proper etiquette and patience. Its answer is not necessarily a dream and there is no such thing as an instant istikhara. When in doubt, go with your own istikhara.

If I were in your situation, I would ask the girl in question to pray it again with its proper etiquette and not rush or be impatient. She should be confident by her own istikhara and not dissuaded by someone else’s dream. Ask her to pray it for 3 or 7 or 21 days and then make a firm decision without second-guessing. As for your istikhara, I feel that it was positive for you.

Please ask her to see and listen to all of these carefully first:
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/hanafi-fiqh/istikhara-the-prayer-of-seeking-guidance/
https://seekersguidance.org/articles/general-artices/the-reality-of-istikhara/
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/general-counsel/what-should-i-do-if-i-prayed-istikhara-and-im-still-unsure/
https://seekersguidance.org/podcast-feeds/supplications-podcast/salat-al-istikhara-explained-by-shaykh-faraz-rabbani/

May Allah bless you in your decision and give you the best in this world and the next.

[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.

This answer was collected from Seekersguidance.org. It’s an online learning platform overseen by Sheikh Faraz Rabbani. All courses are free. They also have in-person classes in Canada.

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