In reply to the demand of talaq, you said: Main tumhe talaq deraha hu bas ek bar bolo …) i.e. if you ask one more time I shall give you talaq. If it was your intention and you take an oath that you intended no talaq by the word you uttered, rather you intended to give talaq if she demands for talaq next time, then your words shall be accepted with oath and the talaq will not take place i.e. if you did not give talaq after these words, then no talaq took place in the question mentioned above. However, if your wife and people present over there say something different from you, then this ruling shall be null and you will have to submit the question again with the statements of wife and people present there.
(2) First, you should have firm intention to control yourself and never utter any word related to talaq any time merely by talaq demand. As far as the matter of wife is concerned, it is very easy to control her. Here are some acts; you would see a good change inside you and your wife if you observe the same: have good conduct, pay full rights, avoid revenge and behave in good manner, keep true intention to abstain from sins and being firm in good deeds in oneself as well as in wife and children.
Allah (Subhana Wa Ta’ala) knows Best
Darul Uloom Deoband