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My younger sister has left home and has befriended a Kaffir, what do we do Islamically?

I am a female with Turkish origin living in the Netherlands.Please excuse me, if i make mistakes in this mail since English isnt my mother tonque and i have never had a proper English education.
i am writing this mail/ask concerning my 16 y/o sister. since she started high school (12 y/o)she has been getting in trouble for a long time, with ups and downs.

Last, a year a go, we (my parents and I) discoverd that she had a relationship/was in love with a Kuffr and we immediately talked to her about why it was a bad thing to do, and that she knew it was forbidden etc. She also made a drama out of it by crying at school that she didnt want to go home, because she had no freedom. My dad gently talked her out of it, but she lost her phone, because she kept having contact with de Kuffr guy. Now a year later, my mom caught her at the front of his house.

The parents of this Kuffr guy apparently took her in their home and when she noticed my mom wanted her to come home, she told those people that she was being abused and we would kill her if she went home. These people dont know my parents so they did not know what to do and called the police and youth emergency/care. I had to call my dad from work, he is a diabetes patient and he had to talk to the police and other people every day since nov 25th to convince everyone my sister was telling lies. 

Long story short: What can we do, besides praying, to help my sister from this bad way of living? Is there a Roqyah for this kinds of situations? We have been crying since that day, but she seems to want to break contact with my dad/mom/me and our youngest sister. We hadnt ever seen her like that, we didnt even know she could be that way.
My 7 y/o sister keeps asking where my 16 y/o sister is and we have a hard time keeping up with her questions.
In chaa Allah she will come home safely.


In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Respected sister

It is our duaa that Allah Ta’āla return your sister home safely and with Imaan. Aameen.

Allah Ta’āla advises us in the Quran:

يَـٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ ٱسۡتَعِينُواْ بِٱلصَّبۡرِ وَٱلصَّلَوٰةِ‌ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ مَعَ ٱلصَّـٰبِرِينَ (سورة البقرة:153)

O ye who believe! Seek help in steadfastness and prayer. Lo! Allah is with the steadfast. 

Based on the above verse we advise you and your family members to perform Salah al-Hājah.

For further details on how to perform Salah al-Hājah, please refer to the following link.


Recite “Ya Mu’eedu” (يا معيد) as much as possible.

You could also recite the following duaa:

يا حَيُّ يا قَيُّومُ، بِرَحْمَتِكَ أسْتَغِيثُ

O Alive and everlasting One, I beseech you by your mercy.[1]

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Asim Patel

Student Darul Iftaa
Venda, South Africa

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.



وروينا في كتاب الترمذي، عن أنس رضي الله عنه، عن النبيّ صلى الله عليه وسلم؛ أنه كان إذا أكربه أمر قال: “يا حَيُّ يا قَيُّومُ، بِرَحْمَتِكَ أسْتَغِيثُ” قال الحاكم: هذا حديث صحيح الإِسناد. الأذكار للنووي ت مستو (ص: 214) دار ابن كثير، دمشق – بيروت

This answer was collected from Askimam.org, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.

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