Is there any form of pardah with ones Husband ??
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Allah Ta’āla has favoured the ummah with the institution of marriage wherein rich bounties are showered upon the spouses. Many things which were impermissible before marriage become permissible afterwards. For example, a Muslim refrains from any form of unnecessary interaction with non mahram opposite gender to such an extent that one even lowers the gaze from them.
After one’s marriage, Allah Ta’āla relaxes these rules and does not only make it permissible for the spouses to interact however they wish rather rewards a spouse for engaging in all types of interactions. They may joke, flirt, cuddle and fulfill their heartly desires from each other’s company. All this, and they will be rewarded for every part of it. This is nothing but the mercy of Allah Ta’āla.
Allah Ta’āla mentions in Qur’ān:
هُنَّ لِبَاسٌ لَكُمْ وَأَنْتُمْ لِبَاسٌ لَهُنَّ
…They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them…
(Qur’ān 2:187)
Allah Ta’āla has used subtle parable to show the intimate and volatile relationship of a husband and wife. Allah Ta’ala referred them both as clothing for each other. The commentators of the Qur’an have mentioned that this could be for many reasons. The most glaring of which are that one finds complete comfort from one’s spouse. This is either through the company a spouse provides, or by clinging to him, or hugging to them just like one’s clothing does.
At the same time clothing also protects the body, and similarly a spouse is always after the best interest of the other. He/She will make efforts to protect one’s spouse from all dangers and harms, whether physical or spiritual, whether worldly or one relating to afterlife. The spouse is a means of securing one’s chastity, lowering one’s gaze and protecting one’s honour. [1]
While all this intimacy affords a husband and wife to be completely transparent to each other, some boundries of hayā’ remain a trademark of a Muslim. After all, modesty and humility is a hallmark of people of faith. When it comes to marital relations Rasulullah salallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam displays this hallmark of hayā’ in the best form.
Let us take a glimpse of conduct and advise from Rasulullah salallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam regarding such and integral and intimate chapter of a muslim’s life.
῾Utba ibn ῾Abd al-Sulami narrates that Rasulullah salallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said:
“Whenever one of you approaches his wife (for conjugal relations) then let him conceal himself, and do not expose like those who are naked”[2]
In another narration it is mentioned that ῾Ā’ishah radiallahu anha, wife of Rasulullah salallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam never saw his private parts.[3]
So, while there is no Shar῾ī pardah (rules of concealment) from one’s spouse, the hayā’ and humility demands that one should conceal oneself during intimacy.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Mawlana Faisal bin Abdul Hameed
Student, Darul Iftaa
Canada
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
www.daruliftaa.net
[1] {هُنَّ لِبَاس لَكُمْ وَأَنْتُمْ لِبَاس لَهُنَّ} كِنَايَة عَنْ تَعَانُقهمَا أَوْ احْتِيَاج كُلّ مِنْهُمَا إلَى صَاحِبه (تفسير الجلالين (ص: 39))
{هُنَّ لِبَاسٌ لَكُمْ وَأَنْتُمْ لِبَاسٌ لَهُنَّ} قَالَ ابْنُ عَبَّاسٍ، وَمُجَاهِدٌ، وَسَعِيدُ بْنُ جُبَير، وَالْحَسَنُ، وَقَتَادَةُ، وَالسُّدِّيُّ، وَمُقَاتِلُ بْنُ حَيَّانَ: يَعْنِي هُنَّ سَكَن لَكُمْ، وَأَنْتُمْ سَكَنٌ لَهُنَّ. وَقَالَ الرَّبِيعُ بْنُ أَنَسٍ: هُنَّ لِحَافٌ لَكُمْ وَأَنْتُمْ لِحَافٌ لَهُنَّ. وَحَاصِلُهُ أَنَّ الرَّجُلَ وَالْمَرْأَةَ كُلٌّ مِنْهُمَا يُخَالِطُ الْآخَرَ ويُمَاسه وَيُضَاجِعُهُ (تفسير ابن كثير ت سلامة (1/ 510))
هُنَّ لِباسٌ لَكُمْ وَأَنْتُمْ لِباسٌ لَهُنَّ استيناف بيان لسبب التحليل وهو قلة الصبر عنهن وصعوبة اجتنابهن لكثرة المخالطة وشدة الملابسة- ولما كان الرجل والمرأة يعتنقان ويشتمل كل منهما على صاحبه شبه باللباس- او لان اللباس كما يستر صاحبه كذلك يكون كل واحد منهما لصاحبه ستراعما لا يحل (التفسير المظهري (1/ 203 )
[2] حدثنا إسحاق بن وهب الواسطي قال: حدثنا الوليد بن القاسم الهمداني قال: حدثنا الأحوص بن حكيم، عن أبيه، وراشد بن سعد، وعبد الأعلى بن عدي، عن عتبة بن عبد السلمي، قال: قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم: «إذا أتى أحدكم أهله فليستتر، ولا يتجرد تجرد العيرين» (سنن ابن ماجه (1/ 618) ،رقم الحديث 1921 )
[3] حدثنا أبو بكر بن أبي شيبة قال: حدثنا وكيع، عن سفيان، عن منصور، عن موسى بن عبد الله بن يزيد، عن مولى لعائشة، عن عائشة، قالت: «ما نظرت، أو ما رأيت فرج رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم قط» (سنن ابن ماجه (1/ 619) رقم الحديث 1921)