2 years ago,a muslim male cousin proposed to me & we told our parents so we commit no sins.His parents said wait till our studies finished.Alhamdullilah,we hav graduated.Our parents refusing now b?cos they don’t get along.They swear at each other.Thinking of having Nikah & moving out.Relatives involved to persuade our parents but they don’t listen. Please advise us on best course of action.Jazzakallah.
Jazakallah for submitting your problem to the institute. You write about your family’s refusal to allow you to marry someone whom they had originally agreed to let you marry.
How old are you and your cousin? Do his parents accept you or are they also against your marriage? You should remember that if there is conflict now between the families, it can happen that this can affect your relationship with your husband later. Especially when you are related, there is a possibility that you could find yourself in a bind when the conflict increases. It is unfortunate that your parents gave you a verbal agreement earlier and are now not prepared to fulfil it.
You need to think very carefully before you commit yourself to marriage under these circumstances. Unfortunately, culture and language issues take over and Islamic values and commandments are forgotten when marriage issues come up. My hope is that you think very seriously about this situation before you make a final decision. Speak to a counsellor or a learned person who will be able to guide you. You are emotionally involved in this situation and may need more objection guidance.
May Allah Ta’ala heal the rift in the family and guide you to make the best decision for your future, ameen.
and Allah Ta’ala Knows Best
CHECKED AND APPROVED: Mufti Ebrahim Desai