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Please tell me if my brother is allowed to find a wife over the internet.

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Askimam.org

My brother has been chatting to a woman over the internet on a pure Islamic wish to find a suitable woman to marry.I wish to know if this is permittable and if it is, what is the extent that they can go to.

Answer

Kindly refer below our standard reply to similar queries.

and Allah Ta’ala Knows Best

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
FATWA DEPT.

There are two fundamental aspects in choosing a marriage partner, a) The
outward appearance, b) The ideology and character of the person.

Generally, as well as naturally, the outward appearance of a person is given
prominence before considering the ideology and character of the person.
Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) also encouraged the boy and girl to
see one another for the purpose of marriage. (Mishkaat). It is, therefore,
advisable to first choose one’s prospective marriage partner and thereafter
enquire about his/her ideology and character through avenues permissible in
Shari’ah, for example, friends, associates and family members. Shari’ah also
emphasizes one making Mashwara (consult) and make Istikhaara (seek Divine
Guidance) before deciding. How much can one achieve by talking to the boy or
girl directly to determine his/her character and ideology?

Surely, the boy and girl will be as impressive as possible to pass the test.
That is not the normal conduct of the person which will be expressed in his
day to day life. There are many negative factors, if the procedure is
reversed, and prominence is given to communicating with the person, to
determine his character and ideology.
a) Can the person you are chatting with be trusted? There are many incidents
of chatting in the context of marriage but have led to illicit and immoral
relationships. Many people, especially, women have been misled and abused.
b) If the boy and girl consider themselves compatible in ideology and
character but disapprove one another’s outward appearance, that will lead to
grief and agony as the communication was in the context of marriage. The
momentum has been built and now it’s against the expectations of one or both
parties.

Life is too dear to tread on unwarranted risk and thin ice. One should
exercise precaution in every aspect of life.

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This answer was collected from Askimam.org, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.