I was previously from a bhora shia sect. After getting getting Hidayat from allah, I have changed myself to be a true muslim leaving behind all the bidat practices of shiaism. I as well as my elder brother have come on true path but rest of my family members including my mother continue with the old shia practices. I tried to convince my mother to come to true path but she insists on continuing with bhora sect. I want to ask a questing regarding marriage. I have read many fatwas on this site which says that marriage should be with the consent and Permission of ones parents. My mother doesn’t give me permission to marry a Muslim girl but insists that I marry a bhora girl and perform Nikha according to the customs of bhora community. I want to ask 2 questions 1) In this case can i oppose my mothers wish and get married to a muslim girl or should I perform Nikha with a bhora girl according to the customs of bhora sect as per my mothers wish. 2) Can a muslim remain without marriage through out his life, if he does not do any thing haraam. Thnks and awaiting yr reply
Please do forgive me for the long delay in responding to your mail.
Alhamdulillah, you have been guided to the straight path, most fortunate are you that Allah Ta’ala has blessed you with this wonderful gift of imaan. Do please go on making effort on the rest of your family members as it is only Allah Ta’ala who grants hidayah but we have to gently invite our loved ones and others to find the true path of Islam. Do go on making dua for all of them.
You write about your choice of a wife and the opposition which you are encountering with your mother due to her ‘values’ and belief system. The answer to your first question is yes, you may marry a Muslim lady, in fact you should marry a Muslim lady. Although Allah Ta’ala commands us to be obedient to our parents, we cannot and should not obey them when they ask us to do anything which is contrary to Allah Ta’ala’s deen. You are allowed to oppose your parents in this matter but do so gently and firmly. Explain to your family that as a Muslim your desire is to have a pious wife with whom you hope to raise pious children. You can also explain that you wish to live a life which conforms to Allah Ta’ala’ commandments.
Your second question puzzles me somewhat. You do perhaps know that it is reported in a hadith that to perform nikah is fulfilling half your Imaan. As Muslims we are not encouraged to live a life of celibacy. You have your natural urges and needs. Allah Ta’ala created man and woman and the institution of marriage so that the two can be a source of comfort and joy, and a means of satisfying their sexual desires in a lawful and most beautiful way as Allah Ta’ala has decreed. Brother, you have to understand that as long as your parents do not leave the sect which they are presently attached to, you will have to make difficult choices in your life as a Muslim. Some situations may be easier to resolve and sometimes you will find yourself in conflict with their values and desires. When it comes to making choices between Allah Ta’ala’s laws and pleasing your parents, you cannot please the former. Allah Ta’ala has to be obeyed. Do remember that you should respect your parents at all times and even though you may have to act against their wishes, let them know that you still love and care for them. Insha’allah with your duas and gentle encouragement they may make the wise decision to practice Islam without any ideology which is foreign to Islam. May Allah Ta’ala guide you and make it easy for your to remain steadfast on His commandments, ameen.
Wassalaam
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