I want to ask a very strange question, I am 22 years and my question is regarding my father. A few years ago he used to be a very pious individual and was in contact with a great sheikh of this era. However shaitan is currently abjucting him and a person of whom couldnt be thought of, of watching television, was watching pornography yesterday night. He does not want to listen regarding the deen of Allah, from his son at all.
Now my question is regarding my own behaviour. I am unable to interact with him in an appropriate way even if i want to, if i cant talk regarding Islam to a person than i am not willing to talk regarding anything else to him. I am filled in anger regarding the loss he is making to himself. My situation is different, a person who doesnt know something and commits a sin is different than one who was most probably ‘Sahib-e-nisbat’ and even then acts so.
Another question is regarding the citation of Bani Israel that they used to stop others from evil but even when they continued to sin, the people of Bani Israel indulgded with them as if they didnt do anything wronge. How does it apply to a normal Muslim in the current life and with whom?
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Your concern for your father is an expression of your love for him and an expression of your sensitivity to Imaan. We make dua Allah Taala grant you the courage to overcome this challenge. Ameen.
Your anger and frustration is understandable. However, our emotions must be controlled within the dictates of Shariah. Shariah emphasises respect and humbleness to one’s father. It is Haram (prohibitively disliked) to show disrespect to one’s father.
In the enquired situation, you will have to draw and balance between respecting your father and disliking his wrongs. Your ultimate aim is to stop your father from the wrong he is doing. That may not be achieved by showing him disrespect and anger. With that attitude you would be helping Shaitan and driving your father deeper into sin.
You know your father better. Adopt the following effective ways to achieve your aim.
- Show him more love and care. Your love and respect for him will advocate your cause better.
- It may be an idea to discuss the issue in confidence with his sheikh.
- Obtain appropriate literature and keep them within his sight.
- Playing Cds of Ulama with advises may also help.
- Turn to Allah with lots of duas. Remember Allah Taala is the Al Hearing and Al Seeing. Make dua with conviction and hope. Inshaallah your fathers condition will improve.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Huzaifah Deedat
Student Darul Iftaa
Lusaka, Zambia
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.