Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
Question:
My husband of 13 years, with sweet lies about holidays, got me out of the house. At the airport, he said he couldn’t travel because of family issues and that he would join me in a week. The next day he cleared my name from all contracts and called me to say that we are finished. He says that he chose his family over me and will go to Iraq to marry another. In his text, he said that everything is finished between us and that I need to find someone else. Does this count in Islam as divorce? Does divorce require any witnesses? What if he comes back and announces that we are still married and now has two wives? He refuses to return my things. When he texts me, he says he will see me one day. What do I do?
Answer:
Assalamu alaykum,
Thank you for your question. I am so very sorry that he has treated you like this. You don’t deserve this, and be assured that Allah sees all and will deliver justice.
Divorce
Unfortunately, because his words were allusive, whether you are divorced or not depends on what his intention was when he wrote that message to you. You will have to ask him whether he intended to divorce you or not. If he did, it counts as one divorce, and if he didn’t, you should ask him to state his divorce from you, once, by telephone or written. There is no need to state it three times, and there is no need for witnesses for a valid divorce in Islam. See the details about an explicit or implicit divorce:
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/shafii-fiqh/what-are-the-explicit-and-implicit-words-of-divorce/
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/shafii-fiqh/divorce-need-uttered-front-witnesses-valid/
His return
If he comes back and announces that you are still his wife, you should save his text message and use it as proof. If he argues with you, take it to an imam and show him; he will tell your ex-husband that he cannot lie against Allah and follow falsehood. Tell him that you have a right to your belongings and ask a third party to get involved and help you get your things. You should walk away from this man as soon as you can and keep him out of your life. You deserve better than being served with his sneaky, underhanded, cowardly divorce.
Turn to Allah
In the meantime, you have your Merciful Lord to help you heal, move on and find happiness in life. Complete your waiting period (‘iddah) correctly; once you are sure of a divorce, pray on time, learn about your religion, take a class on halal and haram of daily life, and read Qur’an daily, even if it’s only half a page. Most importantly, get up before dawn to supplicate, repent for your sins, pray the Prayer of Need. Recite the last three verses of Surah Baqarah before bed, and the Verse of the Throne (Ayatul Kursi), and the last three ‘quls ‘of the Qur’an. Bless the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace), morning and evening, and recite these du’as.
Please see these links as well:
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/general-counsel/my-heart-feels-uneasy-after-divorce-what-can-i-do/
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/shafii-fiqh/etiquettes-going-divorce/
Given the considerations in such cases, please consult reliable local scholars about the specifics of the situation.
May Allah give you the best of this world and the next and bless you with a truly pious spouse.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.