Question:
Assalamu alaykum,
Thank you for your question. I pray that you can gain some clarity on this issue, as gender interaction has criteria that must be followed and requires insight into one’s situation.
Rules of gender interaction
The rules of gender interaction can be found in this reader:
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/general-counsel/a-reader-on-gender-interaction/
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/general-counsel/guidelines-for-interacting-with-the-opposite-sex/
Working with colleagues
Navigating one’s atmosphere at work can be tricky because no two work environments are exactly the same. First, one should set boundaries of gender interaction according to the shari’ah: no touching, no seclusion, guarding the gaze, and covering modestly. Second, one should set some boundaries with the social work gatherings. One’s colleagues should understand that you won’t meet late at night or be in the presence of alcohol.
You should also not linger at social work gatherings but do your minimum duty by showing up, participating in what is necessary, and leaving when you have fulfilled that. Also, assess how often you can get away with missing a gathering here and there.
Mixed gatherings
Generally speaking, mixed gatherings with friends are not permissible, and one should be careful to sit separately when able; this is a big advantage to hanging out with religious people. They usually want to sit separately, too. As for sitting with non-mahram family members, you should always keep a little distance from them at family gatherings, and they will soon learn that you aren’t interested in anything other than social niceties with them. Once you have established your personality as a person of modesty around men, people will label you as such and not try to impinge on your comfort zone.
Whenever in doubt, follow your heart. May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.