My husband was forced to divorce me due to my not conceiving and his parents never accepted me due to past history. I was finding it difficult to conceive and they made my husband divorce me. He didn’t carry out with it however we knew it would be inevitable that he will remarry a girl from India or through the marriage sites that his parents will be advertising on. During the ‘separation’ I conceived subahanallah and naturally. However they in the meantime did find a girl that accepted to marry him and his parents and him promised marriage to the yateem girl from India. Now that I am pregnant which he was always hoping I would just fall pregnant his parents are not allowing him to be with me as they are furious that we lied and kept seeing one another. My husband wants to know if it is wrong to refuse a yateem girl’s marriage after promise had been made and to call it off against his parents wishes and want to know how does he seek forgiveness for deceiving his parents.

Q: My husband was forced to divorce me due to my not conceiving and his parents never accepted me due to past history. I was finding it difficult to conceive and they made my husband divorce me. He didn’t carry out with it however we knew it would be inevitable that he will remarry a girl from India or through the marriage sites that his parents will be advertising on. During the ‘separation’ I conceived subahanallah and naturally. However they in the meantime did find a girl that accepted to marry him and his parents and him promised marriage to the yateem girl from India. Now that I am pregnant which he was always hoping I would just fall pregnant his parents are not allowing him to be with me as they are furious that we lied and kept seeing one another. My husband wants to know if it is wrong to refuse a yateem girl’s marriage after promise had been made and to call it off against his parents wishes and want to know how does he seek forgiveness for deceiving his parents.

Bismillaah

A: When the promises have been made and it was with the blessings of your seniors then there is no need to end this marriage up.

It was wrong for them to make such a demand. Hence, it will be wrong to carry out such a demand. He did the right thing by not divorcing you. He should respect you and the child to be.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.

 

Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)


Q: The issue has now evolved to an even more complicated one whereby he is not going to tell her of me and our unborn child. He will be deceiving her and that he has his parents support on the matter it will not be tough for him. The girl was going to call it off when she heard of a child being borne from a previous marriage and would probably not even go ahead with the nikaah if she was aware of us still being in nikaah and a child on the way. I suspect that my mum in-law plans to only tell her about me after she has consummated her nikaah when she comes from India or worse when she is pregnant herself. My husband has threatened me that if I want to remain with him that I keep this info to myself. Please advise.

Bismillaah

A: It is not a right thing to divorce one without a valid reason. Further, it is also not right to take on another marriage when you cannot take care of them correctly. In this case, one needs to look within himself whether he can mange taking good care of both the wives. If he cannot then there is no need to divorce and separate the first wife.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.

 

Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)