I would like to please ask you a question and would appreciate it if you could help me. I am a woman of 18years of age and I would like to marry a guy from college who is also 18 years of age. We both wish to get married. we have told out parents about each other, my family is accepting the relationship and so are his parents. We want to have a nikah done but our parents say its to early the would want us married at 24.i truly understand our parents as we know that marriage is a huge step in life and hold many responsibilities. i truly want to fulfill my wife duties for this guy and he wants to fulfill his duties as my husband. we want to do right by OUR ALMIGHTY ALLAH S.W.T and by us. The guy and I wish to have a nikah done without my father who will be the wali. my father has not ever rejected this guy he happily accepts his so does my mother. also his mother and father accepts me ALHAMDULILAL. The guy and I do not wish to do sin more and wish to have a nikah done to make our relationship halal. but his parents do not understand this. my parents would agree to nikah if only his parents agree. so therefore my and the guy wish to have a nikah done without parents knowledge just so we can be halal. Later on we wish to get married officialy with our parents consent. please tell me is this nikah valid? as we have no choice both our parents will not agree to nikah until we reach 24 and we do not wish to sin further. They are accepting us without nikah but we want a nikah to be halal Thank you, Adeeba Khan
(Fatwa: 747/D=172/file D=1432)
The sunnah nikah of a girl is that is performed by wali, hence you should try to make the parents of both of you agree and make it sure that the nikah is performed with the mutual understanding of all, though both of you have to wait for some time. But if the effort goes in vain and there is fear that you would fall in sin, then since both of you (boy and girl) are mature hence if you perform nikah in the presence of two legal witnesses the nikah shall be valid. And it is allowed at a time when one fears to indulge in sin. But you should keep in mind that once secret nikah and once open nikah is not a method encouraged by Shariah; hence you should inform your family members about the nikah at appropriate time. In such situation, due to unnecessary delay in legal nikah, parents shall be sinful. And if both of you keep on having patience with chastity while minding the consent of parents and keeping on avoiding talking and meeting in privacy then you would be entitled for reward.
إِنَّمَا يُوَفَّى الصَّابِرُونَ أَجْرَهُم بِغَيْرِ حِسَابٍ [الزمر : 10]
Allah (Subhana Wa Ta’ala) knows Best
Darul Uloom Deoband