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Taking Khul῾a when husband is diagnosed from blood cancer

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How can I ask for Khul῾a since I am married for 6 years, after one year thru the marriage my husband was diagnosed with blood cancer, during his treatment he lost his vision because of severe chemotherapy sessions. I am the only bread earner and I have one son, now doctors have said that we cannot have kids because of chemotherapy. It’s been 4 years since I am surviving and not only supporting him but supporting his family too. Kindly please advice how I can attain Khul῾a, I cannot go further with this relation as I am 32 and my son is 5 years old, I am ready to support my son but I can’t go on with my husband.      

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

We understand you are experiencing an extreme challenge of life. We make dua Allah grant you the courage to overcome the challenges. Ameen.

Life is full of afflictions and tribulations.  Each individual is tested in a different way.  Some are put to test physically while others suffer emotionally.  Rasulullah Sallallāhu Alayhi Wasallam has said:

“Whenever a Muslim is afflicted with any difficulty, Allah forgives the sins, even if he/she is pricked by a thorn.”[1]

We understand you wish to come out of this marriage due to the tremendous pressure on you. You support yourself, your husband, your son and his family. Your pressure is understandable. However, your husband’s condition is involuntary; he has not done anything deliberately to harm you, his condition is beyond his control.

When you entered into the marriage, loyalty, commitment and support formed the core of the marriage. You are expected to stand alongside your husband in the different challenges of life.

At this stage your husband is going through a challenge. We advise you to exercise restraint and stand beside him. Give him aid and support the marriage. To leave him is against the spirit and loyalty of the marriage.  

Put yourself in his shoes. If this would have happened to you what would you want? Imagine if you had cancer, diabetes or any other life threatening disease? Imagine when you need your husband to stand besides you in your hardships and difficulties; he is not there for you. Imagine that feeling. Imagine how would you feel if he walked out on you?

Just as you would expect your husband to stay and be with you at difficult times of your life, he expects the same from you.

We advise you to discuss your difficulties with family members and consider ways of relief. As believers our focus is the hereafter. This life is a means to make investments in the hereafter and gain the pleasure of Allah. When one conditions the mind to please Allah, every difficulty becomes easy.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Mufti Zaid M Shelia,
Student Darul Iftaa

Illinois, Chicago (USA)

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
www.daruliftaa.net



[1]  حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو اليَمَانِ الحَكَمُ بْنُ نَافِعٍ، أَخْبَرَنَا شُعَيْبٌ، عَنِ الزُّهْرِيِّ، قَالَ: أَخْبَرَنِي عُرْوَةُ بْنُ الزُّبَيْرِ، أَنَّ عَائِشَةَ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهَا، زَوْجَ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ، قَالَتْ: قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ: «مَا مِنْ مُصِيبَةٍ تُصِيبُ المُسْلِمَ إِلَّا كَفَّرَ اللَّهُ بِهَا عَنْهُ، حَتَّى الشَّوْكَةِ يُشَاكُهَا» (صحيح البخاري, رقم الحديث 5640: دار طوق النجاة)

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This answer was collected from Askimam.org, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.

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