Sorry for our delay in our response due to unforeseen circumstances.
When you query on disobedient wife, it would be advisable to clarify your statement of ?disobedient wife? ? whether in terms of Shari?ah or in terms of extra requests. However, an approach that has earned many men contentment and happiness which you may in the interim try:
1. Focus your gaze on Allah Ta’ala.
2. Ensure that you are fulfilling your spouses? rights
3. When you enter your home, you smile and greet and speak pleasant words
Initially, it may take your spouse to adjust wondering at the changes and she may even comment or respond in ways that may upset you. However, focus on all the good she does and has done for you. Focus that should you hold your irritation, anger and tongue with patience and tolerance and instead show her love, smiles, kindness and shower her with gifts, spend quality time with her, help her reduce her tasks, see to her rest, her simple needs and focus on what makes her happy. All solely for the pleasure of Allah Ta’ala even if she does not appreciate it you have not failed.
Your reward with Allah Ta’ala is there, Insha Allah. You will see the contentment and other bounties which many pious men have seen, even if she doesn’t change. However, on the brighter side, many have changed with this approach without a lecture nor shouting. Your example is of paramount importance, your Du’aas are also importance. Also beneficial to read after every Fardh Salaat, Rabbanaa hab lanaa min Azwaajinaa qurrata a?ayunin.
CHECKED & APPROVED: Mufti Ebrahim Desai