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Can Islam Help My Fiance and I Decide Which Country We Should Live In?

Answered as per Shafi'i Fiqh by Seekersguidance.org

Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad


My fiance lives in another country. One of us has to relocate after marriage, even if it is another third country. Neither of us wants the other person to sacrifice their dream.

Is there any Islamic guidance in our case? Is it only subject to a mutual agreement or is there any gender-specific instruction?


Thank you for your question.

Mutual Agreement

I referred your question to Shaykh Mohamed Badhib, who gave me this answer: “If the husband and wife can come to an agreement on living in a country that suits them both, then this is the desirable outcome. However, one should not place this stipulation in the marriage contract.”

The Hanafi School

There is some detail about this in the Hanafi school. I learned that there are two positions. First, a woman must obey her husband and move to the place where he wants to live. Second, there is an opinion that a woman is not obliged to leave her homeland and family unless it was agreed upon in the marriage contract.

Please come to a decision mutually, consult others, seek guidance from Allah, uphold the very best character in the process, and trust in Him.

How Can I Resolve With My Fiance Which City We Should Live In?

May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.

Arabic References

يقول الشيخ الدكتور محمد أبوبكر باذيب: بالنسبة لسؤال الأخت المخطوبة، إذا كان الاتفاق بينها وبين خطيبها بعد الزواج أن يعيشوا في بلد يتفقان عليه ويكون العيش فيه أفضل لهما، فهذا شيء طيب. ولكن لا ينبغي أن يكون ذلك شرطاً في عقد النكاح.

This answer was collected from Seekersguidance.org. It’s an online learning platform overseen by Sheikh Faraz Rabbani. All courses are free. They also have in-person classes in Canada.

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