Answered by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Asalamoaleikoum. I live with my parents who are giving me too many problems because of my religiosity. My mother gets angry because I wear qamis and she does not allow me to wear it. What should I do?
Allah states in the Holy Quran:
‘And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], “uff,” and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word.’
(Surah BaniIsrail, Verse 23)
‘And we have enjoined on man goodness to his parents, and if they contend with you that you should associate (others) with me, of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them, to me is your return, so I will inform you of what you did.’
(Surah Ankaboot, Verse 8)
In many places of the Holy Quran Allah has stressed on the importance of respecting parents and treating them with kindness. However, the shariah allows for one to go against the orders of ones parents if it is contrary to the commandments of Allah and the teachings of Prophet Muhammad . In such case, one will not be sinful, but in fact rewarded for remaining steadfast on his religion.
In, regards to your situation, you should try and explain to your parents and if they do not understand, try and get an elder or a respectable figure such as the local Imam etc to try and make them realise. In the meantime you must not be harsh or disrespectful to them and always pray to Allah to change their hearts and bring them onto guidance.
Only Allah knows best.
Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham.