My father have a second wife and left my mother for almost six years becouse my mother couldn`t accept his second wife. But however my father did not neglect his children but only ignore my mom for those years. Now after survival alone for six years, my mother willing to accept the second wife, but my dad could not make decision to reunite with my mom becouse his second wife threatened to leave him if he do so. my dad have not divorce my mom and lebel my mom as `nusyuz’. until now, my mom were left alone clueless and alone. My question is my mom in a sin becouse she could not serve my dad since they did not leave together and yet she still his wife and what is my dad sin for doing this to my mom and not making any decision weather to divorce or reunite for so long.
Last question is what is the name `Damien’ means in Islam?
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatuh
1. Your father was not bound by the Sharī’ah to consult with your mother before taking a second wife. However, it would have been appropriate and wise for him to do so in order to avoid problems, such as the one in question (Fatāwā Mahmūdiyyah: 5/177-178; Fārūqiyyah). Since taking a second wife was permissible for him, your mother should have tried to accept the second wife. Both of your parents should ask Allāh Ta’ālā forgiveness for any mistakes they have made and work on rectifying the situation.
It is not correct for your father to not treat both of his wives equally, especially now when your mother is willing to accept the second wife. Since his second wife is not accepting your mother, we wonder if he is treating her the same way he treated your mother when she could not initially accept the second wife. In the same āyah where Allāh Ta’ālā has permitted him to take a second wife, He has also commanded fair treatment between the two.
وَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تُقْسِطُوا فِي الْيَتَامَى فَانْكِحُوا مَا طَابَ لَكُمْ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ مَثْنَى وَثُلَاثَ وَرُبَاعَ فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تَعْدِلُوا فَوَاحِدَةً أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ ذَلِكَ أَدْنَى أَلَّا تَعُولُوا (النساء: 3)
And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan-girls, then marry [other] women of your choice: two, three, or four. But if you fear that you will not be able to deal justly [between them], then [marry] only one or that which your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice (al-Nisā’: 7).
Therefore, your father must either treat both wives equally or he should maintain only one.
اعلم بأن الزوج مأمور بالعدل في القسمة فيما بين النساء وذلك ثابت بالكتاب والسنة
(المبسوط للسرخسي، كتاب النكاح، باب القسمة بين النساء: 5/190؛ الفكر)
2. We are unable to find the meaning of “Damien.” It is not an Arabic word.
And Allah knows best
Wassalam u Alaikum
Ml. Abrar Mirza,
Student Darul Iftaa
Checked and Approved by:
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Darul Iftaa, Madrassah In’aamiyyah