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Inlaws behavior

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by ShariahBoard.org

As salamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu 

Alhumdulillah I’m blessed to have a good husband, my question is related to my inlaws. 

  1. I dont talk much reason i safeguard my tongue but my inlaws says that shows you are arrogant. They want me to share everything with them but the fact is being married to my cousin nothing is hidden from them except a few personal things that I’m asked not to share. They ask me to open up, and I’m too scared to talk shaytan is everywhere i don’t want to hurt them or do backbiting. Am I doing something wrong?
  2. We were on vacation for 3 months i don’t know what had happened all of sudden few days before leaving my FIL started behaving different, not talking or even looking at me he did the same with me and my kids while leaving though we stay miles and miles away. Until now its the same i even texted him asking to forgive me if i had hurt him but no reply to any of my messages. Earlier his bond was not good with his son  and was too good with me but Alhumdulillah this vacation had got them closer and things got opposite on my end. Do you think i should still be trying to convice him to forgive me for something that i dont know?

بسم اللہ الرحمن الرحیم

الجواب وباللہ التوفیق

It is allowed to conceal your personal matters which you think are expedient to conceal, it should not be  considered an act of arrogance. Rather, it is better to hide those issues on the basis of certain benefits and the reasons that you have mentioned. However, on other matters, stay good humored and display moral virtue. 

If your father-in-law is angry even after you have apologized, you are innocent with no burden upon you. However, it is better that you keep trying to mend the relationship with your father-in-law. Exercise due respect and morality according to “Shari’ah” guidelines when meeting with him. 

فقط واللہ اعلم بالصواب

This answer was collected from Shariahboard.org. It was established under the supervision of the eminent faqih of our era, Hazrat Shah Mufti Mohammed Navalur Rahman damat barakatuhum.

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