Answered by Shaykh Yūsuf Badāt
My question is that my engagement is done, having all the formalities except the nikāh. Can I talk with my fiancé on phone or SMS (text message)? In Islam, is it permissible for me or not?
In the Name of God, Most Merciful, Most Kind
Jazāk Allāh Khayr/ Thank you for your question.
Congratulations on your upcoming marriage.
Talking, fondling and sexual relations are only permissible after nikāh (marriage) in Islam. Since the engagement is complete, there is bound to be loose, informal and intimate talk which then leads to sexual emotions. This is why the Islamic approach would be to avoid talking until the nikāh is performed.
The Almighty states,
“Success is really attained by the believers …. who guard their private parts except from their wives or from those (bondwomen who are) owned by their hands, as they are not to be blamed. However, those who seek (sexual pleasure) beyond that are the transgressors” (Qurʾān 23:1-7)
“So, marry them … and give them their dues, as recognized, they being bound in marriage, not going for lust, nor having paramours.” (Qurʾān 4:24)
“Our Lord, let our spouses and children be a source of joy for us, and keep us in the forefront of the righteous.” (Qurʾān 25:74)
And Allāh Knows Best