Q: I found out that my wife had zina for years before marriage. Though she has repented but I cannot forget about her past. I don’t want to leave her because I don’t believe in any girl, they all are alike. I feel my life is a waste. What should I do?
A. She had committed Zina before marriage but she also repented. The Hadeeth mentions that one who repents from a sin is like one has never committed that sin at all. We learn from this Hadeeth that man has no right to hold a grudge against a repented sinner.
You say that women are all alike. If you mean they are all alike in the sin your wife committed, then such a statement is wholly false and unfair. There are countless women who were chaste and pure before and even after Nikah. Furthermore, when your wife committed Zina before marriage, there was a man with her. So men are also like that, but as not all men are like that, all women are also not like that.
Mufti Siraj adds:
Yes, women may be alike in general characteristics and habits, but that is no reason to despise them or reject them. By holding such thoughts in your heart, you are making yourself miserable. Let go of her past and live in harmony. No person is free from sin, including me and you. So how can we hold a grudge against another sinner, especially one who has repented?
May Allah Ta’aala grant us understanding, Aameen.
Moulana Yusuf Laher
Checked by: Mufti Siraj Desai