All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds, and may His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all of his family and companions.
It is impermissible for the wife to abstain from shaking her husband's hand, even if she has to redo her ablution. This is to preserve mutual respect and amity between both spouses. In this regard, Allah the Almighty, says (What means):" And of His signs is this: He created for you help meets from yourselves that ye might find rest in them, and He ordained between you love and mercy. Lo! herein indeed are portents for folk who reflect." [Ar-Rum/21].
Further, a woman is not permitted to make supererogatory fast in the presence of her husband without taking his permission because she can't ignore the husband's rights due on her, and he has the right to prevent her from making supererogatory fast.
In conclusion, we recommend both spouses to fear Allah and deal with each other in a gentle manner to achieve serenity and help each other in obeying Allah as much as possible.And Allah knows best.