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Istikhara for waiting on a Muslim man who had relationships with non-Muslim women?

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Muftisays.com
He is a Muslim but had several realtionships with non-muslim women. He met a muslim woman through internet whom he wanted to get married. In the meantime he lived together with a christian woman for 3 years. He contacted with her when the christian woman left her. But again he is contacting with the christian woman with whom he was living together, this muslim woman is confused if she should wait for him or not.
Can she make an istikhara to understand that if she should wait for this person, cuz she wants this person to live like a muslim marrying a muslim woman.

Answer
Answer:

With the information provided, in my opinion, this person is conniving, malevolent, deceptive, and a womanizer. And there is nothing but harm and heartache involved in this relationship if it is allowed to continue.

The Muslim sister concerned should move on with her life and have no contact whatsoever ever with this person. A relationship of this sort is Haraam (forbidden) to begin with even if it is by means of the internet. One feels very strongly in relation to this, and there is a possibility that a Muslim sister in is potential harm from this person, (seven unfortunate women have been harmed emotionally already), keeping in mind that what has already been said that it is a Haraam means of communication with a Ghair Muhram, she should discontinue any further communication with this man.

Allah the Greatest has said in the Noble Quran:

“Women impure are for men impure, and men impure for women impure and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity: these are not affected by what people say: for them there is forgiveness, and a honorable provision” (Surah An-Noor, Verse 26)

“And spend of your substance in the cause of Allah, and make not your own hands contribute to (your) destruction; but do good; for Allah loveth those who do good”. (Surah Al-Baqarah, Verse 195)

Mahshallah, it is very virtuous that she wants him to live like a Muslim with a Muslim woman but if she feels this then I advise that she does not marry him to dignify this hope but makes Dua for him from afar, and thereafter leaves it in the hands of Allah the Almighty.

“Verily you (O Muhammad)cannot give guidance to whom you love but Allah will guide whom he wills ?” (Surah Al-Qasas, Verse 56)

In conclusion one will strongly advise ones Muslim sister and say that by marrying this man she is only putting herself into great loss and possible harm. She should stop communications with him immediately; Inshallah there is righteousness and virtue in doing so, Ameen.

And Allah knows best

12th September 2005

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Mufti Abubakr Karolia
Batley, U.K
Founder of the “Islamic Foundation for Theology and Research” (I.F.T.A.R)

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This answer was collected from MuftiSays.com, based in London (UK). It is one of the fruits of Darul Uloom London. Many ‘ulama are involved in answering the Q&A on the site, including: Shaikul Hadeeth Mufti Umar Farooq Sahib, Mufti Saifur Rahman Sahib, Mufti Abdullah Patel Sahib, Maulana Qamruz Zaman Sahib, Mufti Abu Bakr Karolia Sahib.

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