IslamQA

Kissing one’s Cousins

Answered according to Hanafi Fiqh by Muftionline.co.za

Q: May I please have advice (sin,punishment etc) that I can pass on to those females that kiss their male cousins upon greeting and advice to the male cousins that allow their cousins to kiss them. May I also have advice that I may pass on to females that kiss their brother in laws. May Allah reward you in abundance in both worlds. Ameen.

Kissing one's Cousins

A: The Deen of Islam is a complete and comprehensive way of living. It provides guidance and guidelines in every sphere of human life. Every commandment and prohibition possesses immense blessing and abundant benefits. Shariah commands us to observe strict purdah with all those who we are allowed to marry (i.e. ghair-mahrams) in Islam.

Hereunder are few verses of the Qur’aan and Ahaadith of Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) which explains as well as emphasizes the need of observing purdah.

Allah Ta’aala says in the Qur’aan:

يَا أَيُّهَا النَّبِيُّ قُل لِّأَزْوَاجِكَ وَبَنَاتِكَ وَنِسَاءِ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ يُدْنِينَ عَلَيْهِنَّ مِن جَلَابِيبِهِنَّ ذَلِكَ أَدْنَى أَن يُعْرَفْنَ فَلَا يُؤْذَيْنَ وَكَانَ اللَّـهُ غَفُورًا رَّحِيمًا ﴿٥٩﴾

(سورة الأحزاب 59)

“O Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam), command your wives, daughters and the believing women to don the niqaab (veil)”.

In another verse, Allah Ta’aala while commanding the wives of Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) to adopt purdah and don the veil says:

ذَلِكُمْ أَطْهَرُ لِقُلُوبِكُمْ وَقُلُوبِهِنَّ (سورة الأحزاب 53)

“That (observing purdah) is better for the purity of your hearts and their hearts (i.e. the hearts of men)”.

Once Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) questioned the Sahaabah (Radiallahu Anhum) as to what was the most beneficial thing for women (i.e. the thing most beloved in the sight of Allah Ta’aala and most safeguarding for their deen). None of the Sahaabah had given any answer to Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) in that gathering. When Hadhrat Ali (Radiallahu Anhu) returned home and informed Hadhrat Fatima (Radiallahu Anha) regarding the question Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) posed to the Sahaabah. She spontaneously answered, “The thing most beneficial for women and most beloved in the sight of Allah Ta’aala (in safeguarding their deen) is that they do not have any contact with men (looking, meeting etc.) and that men do not have any contact with them.” When Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) was informed of the response of Hadhrat Fatima (Radiallahu Anha), Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) said, “Fatima is part of me.”

Hadhrat Ummi Salmah (Radiallahu Anhaa) reported, “Once Maymoonah (Radiallahu Anha) and I were seated with Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam), it was just then that Hadhrat Abdullah bin Ummi Maktoom (the blind Sahaabi) entered the presence of Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam). Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) immediately commanded Hadhrat Maymoonah (Radiallahu Anha) and I to observe purdah from the blind Sahaabi. I said, “O Nabi of Allah Isn’t he blind and unable to see us (i.e. what is the need for us to make purdah from him)?” Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) retorted, “Are you two also blind?” (i.e. you are able to see him hence you need to observe purdah from him).

Despite the men and women of the Sahaabah being so pure compared to the men and women of these times, yet they were commanded to observe purdah. Hence viewing the overwhelming fitnahs of these times, how much more do we need to observe purdah in our lives.

Hereunder are few Ahaadith that explain the grave warnings and severe punishment for those who disregard and violate this injunction of Deen.

Hadhrat Ma’qal ibn Yasaar (Radiallahu Anhu) reports that Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) said, “It is better for a person that a needle be pierced into his head than touching a woman who it is not permissible for him to touch”.

Hadhrat Abu Umaamah (Radiallahu Anhu) reports that Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) said, “Abstain from being in seclusion with women. By the qasam of that being in whose control lies my life, no man secludes himself with a strange women but shaitaan joins them. And it is better for a person to touch a swine which is messed in mud than to allow his shoulder to touch the shoulder of a strange woman (in a crowd).

Hadhrat Uqbah (Radiallahu Anhu) reports that Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) said, “Guard yourselves from entering upon women (who are unlawful for you)”. An Ansaari Sahaabi (Radiallahu Anhu) enquired, “O Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam)! What about the brother in law?” Nabi (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) replied, “The brother in law is (like) death (i.e. much more precaution should be exercised)”.

From the above we understand the gravity of the sin of freely intermingling with ghair mahrams and not observing purdah. True success and happiness lies in total submission and obedience to the laws of Allah and His Rasul (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam).

عن ابن عمر قال : خطبنا عمر بالجابية فقال يا أيها الناس إني قمت فيكم كمقام رسول الله صلى الله عليه و سلم فينا فقال أوصيكم بأصحابي ثم الذين يلونهم ثم الذين يلونهم ثم يفشوا الكذب حتى يحلف الرجل ولا يستحلف ويشهد الشاهد ولا يستشهد ألا لا يخلون رجل بامرأة إلا كان ثالثهما الشيطان عليكم بالجماعة وإياكم والفرقة فإن الشيطان مع الواحد وهو من الاثنين أبعد من أراد بحبوحة الجنة فيلزم الجماعة من سرته حسنته وساءته سيئته فذلك المؤمن. (ترمذي 2/39)

عن علي أنه كان عند النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم فقال: “أي شيء خير للمرأة؟ فسكتوا، قال: فلما رجعت قلت: لفاطمة: أي شيء خير للنساء؟ قالت لا يرين الرجال ولا يرونهن، فذكرت ذلك للنبي صلى الله عليه وسلم فقال: إنما فاطمة بضعة مني (البزار ، وأبو نعيم فى الحلية وضعف) [كنز العمال 46012]

عن أم سلمة قالت كنت عند رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم وعنده ميمونة فأقبل ابن أم مكتوم وذلك بعد أن أمرنا بالحجاب فقال النبى صلى الله عليه وسلم احتجبا منه. فقلنا يا رسول الله أليس أعمى لا يبصرنا ولا يعرفنا فقال النبى صلى الله عليه وسلم أفعمياوان أنتما ألستما تبصرانه (رواه أبو داود 2/568)

(بذل المجهود باب في المحرمة تغطي وجهها 3/121)

معقل بن يسار يقول : قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه و سلم : لأن يطعن في رأس أحدكم بمخيط من حديد خير له من أن يمس امرأة لا تحل له (طبراني كبير 20/211 #17242)

عن أبي أمامة : عن رسول الله صلى الله عليه و سلم قال : إياكم والخلوة بالنساء والذي نفسي بيده ما خلا رجل وامرأة إلا خل الشيطان بينهما وليزحم رجل خنزيرا متلطخا بطين أو حمأة خير له من أن يزحم منكبه منكب امرأة لا تحل له (طبراني كبير 8/205 #7846)

عن عقبة بن عامر : أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه و سلم قال إياكم والدخول على النساء فقال رجل من الأنصار يا رسول الله ! أفرأيت الحمو ؟ قال الحمو الموت (ترمذي 1/220)

Answered by:

Mufti Zakaria Makada

Checked & Approved:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

This answer was collected from MuftiOnline.co.za, where the questions have been answered by Mufti Zakaria Makada (Hafizahullah), who is currently a senior lecturer in the science of Hadith and Fiqh at Madrasah Ta’leemuddeen, Isipingo Beach, South Africa.

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