Q: I have told my husband a few times that I want a Talaq due to the following reason. We married for 18 years
1. He has never gave me nafaqah
2. He is always rude to me
3. He is disrespectful towards me
4. He does not contribute to the childrens health and clothes needs.
5. He is always asking me for money and never paying it back.
6. He never considers that by not paying me back that whatever debts I may have incurred cannot be covered when he does not pay me back.
7. He has not been intimate with me for 4 years and even then it was only twice a year.
8. He has nothing left over for me never gets me anything for my birthday for the whole 18 years that we are married.
9. He never stands up for me against his family when there was ever an issue.
10. He comes from a wealthy family and they know he does not provide for me or his kids.
11. My kids are studying hifz and he will never sit with them /relieve me sometimes to test them.
He has just asked me for money again this month and I told him No. He got upset to which I said that I was going to resign and stay at home so that he cant ask me for money anymore. He then said he wants a Talaq. So I told him it just proves that he would not talaq me before because he needed me for my money. Now that I will not have money should I resign I will be of no use to him and he cannot take responsibilty for a wife and children.
He has so many debts . I cannot understand what he does with his money that he earns as he is a plumbing contractor. Our rent is even behind.
I need some advise going forward as I feel the talaq is the best thing for me and my children
A: If it is not manageable and you have lost interest in him and you are afraid that you will not show him the respect that he requires then it is appropriate that you separate respectfully.
And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)