dowry Archives | IslamQA

Find answers to your Islamic questions by Mufti Zakaria Makada (Hafizahullah), who is currently a senior lecturer in the science of Hadith and Fiqh at Madrasah Ta’leemuddeen, Isipingo Beach, South Africa.

The question is with regards to a wife and husband. Due to several different reasons, after three years of marriage, the wife has decided to terminate the marriage. Some of these reasons are as follows: The husband has intermittently been abusive to the wife (physically and verbally). Other crucial details are that the husband was involved in the consumption of alcohol during the 3 years of marriage and other prohibited things such as gambling. During the latter part of the marriage, the husband began frequenting strip clubs and also allegedly attempting to have physical relations with other women and much more. The husband is not practicing. In the three years of marriage the wife has attempted to instill in her husband to perform prayers, fast, etc. But to no avail. The present situation is, the wife has left the husband (going back to her country) as a temporary measure initially, but it has been 14 months since. After much thought and deliberation, and several failed attempts to salvage the marriage, she has decided to terminate the marriage. The main reason for this is because although it has been just over a year with them separating, her several attempts of reconciliation between herself and her husband (family too) have been unsuccessful. The husband and his family do not respond at all, to the extent that they also changed their telephone numbers so that the wife cannot get in contact to settle things. The dowry (mahr) of 17,075 has not yet been paid. If the husband and his family refuse the right of a khula from the wife, what will be the next step that the wife should take? How does the wife obtain release from the marriage? Also, what happens to the mahr (and if they refuse to pay that too)?

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I got married in April 2011. Since the very beginning of the marriage my in-laws never wanted me to be happy and always created problems between me and my husband. They used to harass and insult me. I was blessed with a baby boy in 2012. I was just passing the days with mental torture and insecurity without any true sense or happiness of married life. Husband failed to understand his role and responsibility and never shared anything me. He and his whole family treated me like a slave and an enemy. On 25th November 2014 they (husband, mother-in-law and father-in-law) forcibly brought me back to Hyderabad from Dubai. I had to obey their order as my husband locked me up in a room in Dubai and threatened to cancel my visa. On reaching Hyderabad I filed a harassment complaint (under section 498-A) against my husband and in-laws and the case is pending in court. It has been 2 years now and myself and my 4 year old son are staying at my parents house. In these 2 years neither my husband nor anyone from his family has tried to contact/email me. Husband is not attending the court sessions also as he is in Dubai. I am ready to withdraw the case if my husband divorces me. We are not demanding the dowry amount nor the gold ornaments which are with my mother-in-law. My father-in-law is now demanding that I give away my son to them and then only my husband will divorce me. He wants to take away my child from me. Kindly please let me know what is the Islamic ruling regarding a child who is 4 years old and who has not seen or spoke to his father for the past 2 years.

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