Answered by Shaykh Abdullah Anik Misra
I was trying to be righteous but I failed too many times. When I ask Allah to make me righteous a hesitation arises that I don’t deserve that righteousness; others are righteous because Allah blessed them with righteousness from the start. Maybe I am trying to be good on my own (I seek refuge in Allah from this). I don’t know.
This is overthinking and simply misgivings. Do not try to analyze Allah’s will or who you really are and what you deserve. Just try your best to do good without expecting perfection and turn to Allah whenever you slip, while thinking well of Allah at all times, not relying on yourself, and having hope in His mercy and reward.
Keep Allah’s words in mind: “And my ability (to be and do good) is only from Allah; I totally put my trust in Him and turn towards Him again and again.” [Quran, 11:88]
[Shaykh] Abdullah Anik Misra
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Abdul-Rahim Reasat
Shaykh Abdullah Anik Misra was born in Toronto, Canada, in 1983. His family hails from India, and he was raised in the Hindu tradition. He embraced Islam in 2001 while at the University of Toronto, from where he completed a Bachelor of Business Administration. He then traveled overseas in 2005 to study the Arabic language and Islamic sciences in Tarim, Yemen, for some time, as well as Darul Uloom in Trinidad, West Indies. He spent 12 years in Amman, Jordan, where he focused on Islamic Law, Theology, Hadith Sciences, Prophetic Biography, and Islamic Spirituality while also working at the Qasid Arabic Institute as Director of Programs. He holds a BA in Islamic Studies (Alimiyya, Darul Uloom) and authorization in the six authentic books of Hadith and is currently pursuing specialized training in issuing Islamic legal verdicts (ifta’). He holds a certificate in Counselling and often works with new Muslims and those struggling with religious OCD. He is an instructor and researcher in Sacred Law and Theology with the SeekersGuidance The Global Islamic Seminary. Currently, He resides in the Greater Toronto Area with his wife and children. His personal interests include Indian history, comparative religion, English singing, and poetry.