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Visiting my Mother During ‘Iddah

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Mathabah.org

Answered by Shaykh Yūsuf Badāt

Question:

A woman’s husband passed away. She is at present in ‘iddah. Her mother is 92 years old and completely incapable of moving. Will it be permissible for the woman in ‘iddah to go and visit her mother who lives 8 kilometers away?

Answer:

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيْم

In the name of Allāh, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

Jazāk Allāh Khayr/ Thank you for contacting Mathābah Institute.

During ‘iddah, leaving the home is only permissible islamicaly for a necessity. Visiting an ailing elderly mother would be permitted provided all other regulations of ‘iddah are adhered to, such as not over adorning oneself, wearing appropriate apparel and returning home prior to the night. – (See: Rad Al-Muḥtār, Vol 3, Page 536, Dār Al-Fikr[1])

A few women in ‘iddah came to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and asked, “We feel alone in the night. We stay with one another. In the morning, we return home early.” The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) stated, “There is no objection in talking to one another at the home of one of you. [However,] When you intend to go to sleep, every one of you should return home to sleep at your own home.” – (Bayhaqī 15512)[2]

Only Allāh knows best


[1] وَجَوَّزَ فِي الْقُنْيَةِ خُرُوجَهَا لِإِصْلَاحِ مَا لَا بُدَّ لَهَا مِنْهُ كَزِرَاعَةٍ وَلَا وَكِيلَ لَهَا طَلُقَتْ أَوْ مَاتَ وَهِيَ زَائِرَةٌ فِي غَيْرِ مَسْكَنِهَا عَادَتْ إلَيْهِ فَوْرًا لِوُجُوبِهِ عَلَيْهَا

وَتَعْتَدَّانِ أَيْ مُعْتَدَّةُ طَلَاقٍ وَمَوْتٍ فِي بَيْتٍ وَجَبَتْ فِيهِ وَلَا يَخْرُجَانِ مِنْهُ إلَّا أَنْ تُخْرَجَ أَوْ يَتَهَدَّمَ الْمَنْزِلُ أَوْ تَخَافُ انْهِدَامَهُ أَوْ تَلَفَ مَالِهَا أَوْ لَا تَجِدَ كِرَاءَ الْبَيْتِ وَنَحْوَ ذَلِكَ مِنْ الضَّرُورَاتِ فَتَخْرُجُ لِأَقْرَبِ مَوْضِعٍ إلَيْهِ وَفِي الطَّلَاقِ إلَى حَيْثُ شَاءَ الزَّوْجُ وَلَوْ لَمْ يَكْفِهَا نَصِيبُهَا مِنْ الدَّارِ اشْتَرَتْ مِنْ الْأَجَانِبِ مُجْتَبًى وَظَاهِرُهُ وُجُوبُ الشِّرَاءِ  لَوْ قَادِرَةً أَوْ الْكِرَاءِ بَحْرٌ وَأَقَرَّهُ أَخُوهُ وَالْمُصَنِّفُ قُلْت لَكِنَّ الَّذِي رَأَيْته بِنُسْخَتَيْ الْمُجْتَبَى اسْتَتَرَتْ مِنْ الِاسْتِتَارِ فَلْيُحَرَّرْ وَلَا بُدَّ مِنْ سُتْرَةٍ بَيْنَهُمَا فِي الْبَائِنِ لِئَلَّا يَخْتَلِيَ بِالْأَجْنَبِيَّةِ وَمُفَادُهُ أَنَّ الْحَائِلَ يَمْنَعُ الْخَلْوَةَ الْمُحَرَّمَةَ وَإِنْ ضَاقَ الْمَنْزِلُ عَلَيْهِمَا أَوْ كَانَ الزَّوْجُ فَاسِقًا فَخُرُوجُهُ أَوْلَى لِأَنَّ مُكْثَهَا وَاجِبٌ لَا مُكْثُهُ وَمُفَادُهُ وُجُوبُ الْحُكْمِ بِهِ ذَكَرَهُ الْكَمَالُ وَحَسُنَ أَنْ يَجْعَلَ الْقَاضِي بَيْنَهُمَا امْرَأَةً ثِقَةً – كتاب الدر المختار وحاشية ابن عابدين رد المحتار ج٣/ ص٥٣٦ دار الفكر

[2] عَنْ مُجَاهِدٍ قَالَ اسْتُشْهِدَ رِجَالٌ يَوْمَ أُحُدٍ فَآمَ نِسَاؤُهُمْ وَكُنَّ مُتَجَاوِرَاتٍ فِي دَارٍ فَجِئْنَ النَّبِيَّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَقُلْنَ يَا رَسُولَ اللهِ إِنَّا نَسْتَوْحِشُ بِاللَّيْلِ فَنَبِيتُ عِنْدَ إِحْدَانَا فَإِذَا أَصْبَحْنَا تَبَدَّرْنَا إِلَى بُيُوتِنَا فَقَالَ النَّبِيُّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ تَحَدَّثْنَ عِنْدَ إِحْدَاكُنَّ مَا بَدَا لَكُنَّ فَإِذَا أَرَدْتُنَّ النَّوْمَ فَلْتَؤُبْ كُلُّ امْرَأَةٍ مِنْكُنَّ إِلَى بَيْتِهَا – رواه البيهقي ١٥٥١٢

This answer was collected from Mathabah.org. It’s an Islamic educational institute based in Canada. The questions are generally answered by Sheikh Yusuf Badat and Sheikh Omar Subedar.