Recently, two boys came to see my daughter for marriage purpose. There are good signs but my daughter is confused. The first boy is tall and good-looking. The second boy is short and average looking. They are both polite but second boy speaks with islamic manners.He said salam when he spoke said masha'Allah, Alhahdulilllah, Jazakallah etc. They are on student permit. She is worried they may want to marry just for residency. Two questions. 1) Should she do Istikharah for second boy and only if answer or feeling is NO then do Istikharah for first boy? 2) Will her fear that they marry for residency be removed after a positive Istikharah?
In The Name Of Allah, The Most-Merciful, The Most Kind
Imam An-Nawawi has said, “After performing the istikharah, a person must do what he is wholeheartedly inclined to do and feels good about doing and should not insist on doing what he had desired to do before making the istikharah. And if his feelings change, he should leave what he had intended to do, otherwise, he is not completely leaving the choice to Allah, and would not be honest in seeking aid from Allah’s power and knowledge. Sincerity in seeking Allah’s choice means that one should completely leave what he himself had desired or determined.” (Fiqhus Sunnah: 2.32)
After performing istikarah the person will (Insha Allah) get guidance from Allah and be inclined towards what is right. It is not necessary that it is seen in a dream or even as a vision while awake. The individual will just feel what is right and should then go on to do the task or make the decision.
With regards to your question, there are two ways to look at it. If your daughter is not inclined to any of the proposals then she should do istikharah for both proposals. If however, if she is inclined to the second proposal then she should still do istikharah with the intention to seek barakah and goodness in the marriage.
Insha Allah, if the feeling she gets in her heart is good then any doubts she may have about the proposal will go away.
Only Allah knows best
Answered by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham