Answered by Shaykh Abdul-Rahim Reasat
Question: Assalamu alaykum
I’m a 25 years old girl from Pakistan. I have a question related to masturbation. I have been masturbating since I was 13 years old. Every time I masturbate I repent and promise Allah that I will not do this sin again, but after a week I do it again. I am engaged but I am not getting married because of this, because I think that I am not good enough for him. Have I lost my chastity by doing all this? Is it forbidden for me to marry a chaste man now?
Answer: Wa ‘alaykum as-salam wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh
I pray you are well.
There is no need to feel depressed about this issue. You have not lost your virginity, nor your chastity by doing these acts. Also, you have not become a lesbian.
Keep turning back to Allah. He loves it when a servant repents.
Committing these sins does not mean you are not good enough to be married to someone; rather, it is the means to get yourself out of them. Allah has blessed you with a potential spouse to take you out of these problems. Thank Him, and go into the marriage with every intention and action to make it a successful marriage.
In general, it is obligatory to hide your past sins. Ask Allah to veil your sins from people in this life and the next, and for Him to grant you the ability to stay away from them.
Telling your future husband of these matters is likely to cause a rift between you so do yourself a favour, and do not tell him.
Please refer to this answer for more information.
May Allah grant you the best of both worlds.
[Shaykh] Abdul-Rahim Reasat