Answered by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
I’d like to get your opinion on a marriage proposal situation. Someone has recommended a sister to me for marriage. I haven’t even seen this sister before. I was told, though that she would want to know me first. They would like to meet up with me sometime for lunch or dinner (both of them). Is this okay if done in a public restaurant? Or should I at least bring a friend with me, too? As far as this girl getting to know me, I’m pretty sure that this can only be done with others around, correct?
Walaikum assalam wa rahmatullah,
It is fine to meet, within limits of propriety, in order to know more about the person, if there is genuine reason to believe that the marriage will work (i.e. the parents are likely to agree, finances, etc…).
One should avoid public and social places, lest others see and in order to avoid lowering one’s guard too much. One should also remember the difference between getting to know someone and thus being able to determine whether they are suitable, and casual socializing, which would remain interdicted.
It is best done at a private location, and in the presence of people whose presence would cause one to behave in a restrained yet still comfortable manner.
Wassalam,
Faraz Rabbani
(faraz@sunnipath.com;hanafi@sunnipath.com)