should a muslim woman or man that did zinah in their past and now asking for sincere forgiveness from Allah, should tell to potential mate that they are not virgin? Should the person say it after the nikkah, before or never?
There are two issues: A) Repentance B) Informing prospective marriage partner
We all are human and bound to commit sins and errors. Rasulullah (Sallalahu Alayhi Wasallam) is reported to have said, “All the children of Adam commit sins, the best of those who sin, are those who repent”. Rasulullah (Sallalahu Alayhi Wasallam) mentioned Allah deals with his slaves according to their expectations. Therefore, one should have firm conviction that Allah has forgiven the sin and thereafter do not expose this to anyone. Rasulullah (Sallalahu Alayhi Wasallam) said “evil is that person who commits wrong and thereafter exposes his sins”.
The purpose of marriage is to live with ones spouse with love, respect and peace. Honesty plays an integral role in achieving this. Many family disputes stems from the partners losing trust in each other due to the lack of honesty. Virginity is a crucial aspect of marriage. If you do not divulge this information, it is possible that this information could have implications on the future of the marriage. Therefore, you should mention that to the person coming to see you. You could explain him that you have repented of the past. Continue making Dua to Allah, He will bless you with a partner who is compatible, loving and caring.
And Allah Knows Best
Mufti Ebrahim Desai