Answered by: Alimah Siddiqa al-Farsiyyah
Question
I really liked a girl online and we have been dating for more than 2 years online but have never met. I have informed my parents but they never agreed and they forcefully made me do Nikah with my cousin against my will. She (my cousin) hasn’t started living with me yet but she will after one week from now. However, I plan to go and marry my girlfriend as well in the next month after I have enough expenses to live on my own.
My question is I have done online sex with my girlfriend after my Nikah (through showing private parts and masturbating in front of each other). Have I committed Zina after Nikah? I have heard somewhere that until my private part doesn’t enter her private part, it does not count as Zina. I understand that it is still a sin that I saw her private parts but I am really worried about Zina and its punishment. Please do give me some guidance.
بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيْم
In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful
Answer:
Assalamu Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh,
It is unfortunate to hear that you are engaged in this sin. To answer your question, the technical Zina that qualifies for punishment is when a male inserts his private organ in such a female’s organ who is unlawful for him.[1] Also, your nikah with your cousin is valid as long as you participated in the offer & acceptance, even if you did it against your will.[2] Therefore, you are considered a married man.
Since you are not directly involved in physical Zina, you do not qualify for the punishment of Zina. However, this does not mean that you are not incurring grave sin. The Prophet (salla llaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) has said: “Allah has written for Adam’s son his share of adultery which he commits inevitably. The adultery of the eyes is the sight (to gaze at a forbidden thing), the adultery of the tongue is the talk, and the inner self wishes and desires and the private parts testify all this or deny it.”[3]
To conclude, although you may have not met the criteria of the Zina punishment, you are still considered to be committing Zina based on the above hadith. You must repent as soon as possible and live a dignified life with your halal partner. If you wish to marry someone else, you must do it in a halal manner.
Only Allah knows best
Written by Alimah Siddiqa al-Farsiyyah
Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham
[1] Ibnu Abidin, Raddul Muhtar V.6 Pg.8, Al-Ashrafiyyah
[2] Ibnu Abidin, Raddul Muhtar V.4 Pg.428, Al-Ashrafiyyah
[3] Sahih Al-Bukhari, Babu Zina ‘l-Jawarih Duna ‘l-Farj