Home » Hanafi Fiqh » Muftionline.co.za » Dealing with the Struggle of Finding a Halal Marriage: My Story

Dealing with the Struggle of Finding a Halal Marriage: My Story

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Muftionline.co.za

Q: I have a problem and it’s hard. I really can not handle this feeling anymore. I really try to focus on salaat and dikr. But it is not enough. I have no one to talk to besides Allah Ta’ala. I want to get married and I even tried muslim dating sites. After some emails I met someone he told me that he wants to come home. I told my mother after couple days. He said I could never be his wife but he liked me and he wanted to date me more. I didn’t do anything with him so I got scared and broke the contact with him. It was the little hope I had that was destroyed and I feel angry and sad and stupid. My father is in bad health he can’t search for me and my brothers also can’t because they dont have the time. So I am forced (thats what i feel) to date men only with the intention to get married. But they want other things and I can’t do that. Am I weird not wanting sex. They call me old fashioned And they say they dont trust me because I am almost 31. I just can’t take this anymore. I don’t have someone I can ask for advise. Please give me yours. I don’t want anything just some advice because I don’t know why I am here and why I feel so much pain. It really kills me inside. I want to end this. I know these days are hard to do things in a halaal way but when halaal is really hard I am afraid I will do haraam.


A: This is not a valid excuse. If your household people are not helping you to get into a marriage then you may contact an ulama body. They could arrange the marriage. Whatever the situation may be any type of premarital relationship is impermissible.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.

Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

This answer was collected from MuftiOnline.co.za, where the questions have been answered by Mufti Zakaria Makada (Hafizahullah), who is currently a senior lecturer in the science of Hadith and Fiqh at Madrasah Ta’leemuddeen, Isipingo Beach, South Africa.

Read answers with similar topics: