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What Can a Husband Do if His Wife Is Being Rude to His Family and the Children Are Being Influenced?

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by DarulIftaBirmingham

Answered by: Maulana Nazrul Islam


My wife from the beginning has been rude with my family as such she has taught children not to be loving with father’s family so now grown up they never give salams to my sisters, I am concerned about how they will act when they get married to some other family this habit is forbidden.

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful


Islam encourages us to maintain family ties and takes them very seriously.

Allah says;

O mankind, fear your Lord who created you from a single soul, and from it created its match, and spread many men and women from the two. Fear Allah in whose name you ask each other (for your rights), and fear (the violation of the rights of) the womb-relations. Surely, Allah is watchful of you. (Surah Nisa verse 1)

O you who believe, be steadfast for (obeying the commands of) Allah, (and) witnesses for justice. Malice against a people should not prompt you to avoid doing justice. Do justice. That is nearer to Taqwa. Fear Allah. Surely, Allah is all aware of what you do. (Surah Maidah verse 8)

Aisha R.A. reported Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) as said;

The tie of kinship is suspended to the Throne of Allah and says He who joins me Allah would join him and he who cut me Allah would cut him. (1) (Sahih Muslim 2555)

Inshallah, try to explain to your wife that this type of behaviour is not according to Islam. Mention to her that bad akhlaq and characteristics are things that make people turn away from such individuals. Behaving rudely in this manner will cause harm to a person or in your case your children later in their life. 

Only Allah knows best.

Written by Maulana Nazrul Islam

Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah

Darul Ifta Birmingham

(1)حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو بَكْرِ بْنُ أَبِي شَيْبَةَ، وَزُهَيْرُ بْنُ حَرْبٍ، – وَاللَّفْظُ لأَبِي بَكْرٍ – قَالاَ حَدَّثَنَا وَكِيعٌ، عَنْ مُعَاوِيَةَ بْنِ أَبِي مُزَرِّدٍ، عَنْ يَزِيدَ بْنِ رُومَانَ، عَنْ عُرْوَةَ، عَنْ عَائِشَةَ، قَالَتْ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏ “‏ الرَّحِمُ مُعَلَّقَةٌ بِالْعَرْشِ تَقُولُ مَنْ وَصَلَنِي وَصَلَهُ اللَّهُ وَمَنْ قَطَعَنِي قَطَعَهُ اللَّهُ ‏”‏ ‏.‏ (Sahih Muslim 2555)

This answer was collected from DarulIftaBirmingham.co.uk, which is run under the supervision of Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah from the United Kingdom.