Assalam o alaykum
I married in 2017 and 6 month pregnant now. My husband is in relationship with another girl and its from past 10 years. They both love each other, but as I am pregnant, the husband is just confused what to do.
The husband is not happy with me, but he is ready to sacrifice as people in the community will talk. We are from Indian community and this community talks a lot on people’s issues.
I am now confused what to do. My husband works in another country and he talks to me only once or twice in a moth. Can you advice me what is the best solution? Should I take a divorce?
Waiting for your advice.
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Sister in Islam,
We apologise for the belated response.
You state your husband is having an illicit relationship for the past 10 years. If your husband loved another woman, then why did he marry you? Why did he make you pregnant?
We advise you to discuss your frustration with the seniors of your family, and explain to them what you are going through. Tell them about the illicit relationship of your husband and how it is having a negative impact in your life. They should take the matter up with the seniors of your husband’s family with the hope of amicably resolving the issue.
Allah Ta’ala says:
وَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ شِقَاقَ بَيْنِهِمَا فَابْعَثُوا حَكَمًا مِّنْ أَهْلِهِ وَحَكَمًا مِّنْ أَهْلِهَا إِن يُرِيدَا إِصْلَاحًا يُوَفِّقِ اللَّهُ بَيْنَهُمَا ۗ إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ عَلِيمًا خَبِيرًا
Translation: If you fear that the couple may separate, then appoint (with their consent) a mediator from his family and a mediator from her family (because relatives generally have a more thorough knowledge of the situation). If they both desire reconciliation, Allah will create unity between the couple (if this is best for them). Verily Allah is All Knowing, Informed.
(Surah Al-Nisaa, Verse 35)
If after making attempts of reconciliation, they find no solutions to your marriage and that you are being oppressed and cheated, you should make istikhara and make a decision accordingly.
Put your trust in Allah and seek strength from him. Du’aa is the weapon of a believer.
May Allah Ta’ala ease your pain and suffering and alleviate the predicament you are faced with. Aameen.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Muhammad I.V Patel
Student Darul Iftaa
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.