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My wife is against my family members and threatening me with separation. What should I do?

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Askimam.org

i have Problem with my wife and there family they want to dominate me in all cases and they are against my family i have my widow mother ,One Elder sister and Elder brother nobody for me but still my wife is not compatible with my family and she fought with my sister 3years before and my wife is not talking with her for the past 3years now remaining is my mother and brother they are once again against to my Mother and brother and my Nikkah was happen with my wish but My family accepted due to me because of my choice i feel every time she dominates me not to support my family and every time she is threatening me leave me and i have 3kids every time if we fight i will step down to speak with her so they thought this is my weakness so they rule me which not tolerate to me further so pls advise me(Indirectly there are threating me for separation)


In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Firstly, if you are fulfilling your wife’s rights then her threatening you with separation has no basis and such a separation will not constitute a divorce.

Secondly, you have not mentioned the reason why your wife is against your family members. What is exactly the nature of the conflict that causes your wife to do that? Is she just against your family for no reason or is there a reason for it? Without this vital information we cannot advise you properly.

Thirdly, you should seek out the assistance of a local scholar that has experience in dealing with marital issues and get marital counseling. 


Lastly, make constant duā (supplication) for yourself and your wife that Allah put love and harmony in your relationship. The following duā from the Quran is very beneficial in this regard:

رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا 

“Our Lord! Grant us from our wives and our offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and make us leaders for the pious” [Surah Al-Furqan 74]


And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best 

Mufti Sohail ibn Arif,
Assistant Mufti, Darul Iftaa
Chicago, USA

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

This answer was collected from Askimam.org, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.

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