Answered by Shaykh Abdurrahman ibn Yusuf Mangera
How does one interpret the hadith where the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) ignored his wives for a whole month, when there is another hadith that states one should not stay angry at another Muslim for more than 3 days?
Assalamu alaykum
In the name of Allah the Inspirer of truth.
The messenger of Allah (upon him be peace) did not vow to stop speaking to his wives during those days. The hadith states that he took a vow to abstain from sexual intercourse (ila‘) and he did not sleep with them for the month. (See Mirqat al-mafatih 6:395)
This was done for good reason. The Mothers of the believers had asked for an increase in expenditure and the Messenger (upon him be peace) had gone into a retreat. At the end of the month he presented to each of them an option to either remain with him and benefit from the hereafter or that he separate from them and they would be free to leave. They all chose to stay with him. Allah had ordered him in the Qur’an:
O Prophet! Say to your consorts: If it be that you desire the life of this world, and its glitter, then come! I will provide for your enjoyment and set you free in a handsome manner. But if you seek God and His Messenger and the Home of the Hereafter, verily God has prepared for you, the well-doers amongst you, a great reward’. (Surat al-Ahzab, 33:28-9)
And Allah knows best.
Wassalam
Abdurrahman ibn Yusuf