Answered by: Maulana Irfan Ali
My wife and I got married 5 years ago. I had “needs” from my wife and had already tried out various ways to get my “needs” fulfilled throughout these 5 years. We have a daughter now, who is 4 yrs. old.
One day, I wrote down the word “TALAQ” in Arabic letters on a piece of paper to threaten my wife. My intention wasn’t for a divorce. Then, I felt like my handwriting was bad and unclear, so I wrote it out another two times. Then I rolled it up and kept that paper in my Jeans pocket.
At the time, when I wrote the words, I only meant to write the word “Talaq” out once and added the other two to ensure that the word was correct as I am not an Arab or an Alim.
The next afternoon, my wife and her sister were sat together in a room and I went to them and told my wife to come with me to a private place so that we could talk. My wife argued and her sister (my sister-in-law) started to abuse me and it made me so angry, so I pulled out the paper I wrote on in the morning and threw it to my wife. At that time, I didn’t say anything to her; Allah knows best.
I hadn’t intended for a divorce. I only wished to threaten her at both times[when I wrote and threw the paper]. I asked the Muftis around my area and they said that all three “Talaq”s are counted.
Please help me understand, Sir. I just want to know:
Is the “Talaaq” given?
If so, how many times was it counted?
بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيْم
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
The matters regarding divorce should be taken very seriously; divorce should not be demanded or written as a threat. One should ponder over and over, and then again, prior to thinking of such actions as divorce is a very delicate matter.
Taking a hasty decision to be the matter for only threat or to create an environment of fear using matters of such delicacy can be detrimental.
In relation to your three questions, all three divorces which were written will stand. Furthermore, it is compulsory for you to separate as living together is no longer lawful.
Writing divorce, even if only intended to scare one’s spouse, and then giving it to them signifies the issuing of divorce. The writing of the word divorce in Arabic, if it’s readable, will class as divorce even if the intention is not present.
Only Allah knows best
Written by Maulana Irfan Ali
Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham
Fatawaa Mahmoodiyah page 187 volume 18 Maktabah Mahmoodiyah