suni indian muslim girl wants to marry a turkish man who she is
aquitaine with. many boys been to see her for marriage but none she liked.
Now as she feels she is getting older and may not get as many mem coming with proposals she had found a turkish man who she gets on with.
She says he is now a more practising muslim who prays salah and wants to marry him.
How can we convince her that this is a mistake as our cultures are very different and can lead to problems in the future.
What about their children? He may have different believes and want yo bring them up different to how an Indian muslim family would.
what is your advise on what we should do. Should we accept her marriage to the turkish man and if not what things should we say to convince her that it would be wrong to marry him.
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
As far as beliefs are concerned, if they both subscribe to the aqidah (creed) of the Ahl al-Sunnah Wal Jama’ah, the girl has a right to marry whom she wants, subject to that man being a compatible match (kufu). If however, he is not a compatible match, then her guardian (wali: father, etc.) will have a right to object to her marriage. For details about the factors in which compatibility is considered please see: http://askimam.org/public/question_detail/17926
Regardless of the situation, she should not communicate with this man as he is a stranger to her. An elder from the girl’s side can communicate with him and gather enough information for the girl to make a proper, informed decision such as his views regarding the upbringing of children and so on.
She should make istikharah and also mashwarah since our elders have more experience and wisdom than us and their input and foresight are important in arriving at a decision.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Sohail ibn Arif,
Student Darul Iftaa
Chicago, USA
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.